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when my mum thibks she is somewere else do we tell her the truth

monty14

Registered User
Sep 19, 2013
14
0
when my mum is sat at home she asks whos house it is and when can she go home. we have been telling her this is her house are we doing the right thing. we dont want to confuse her anymore because she argues with us and says its not her house.
 

ellejay

Registered User
Jan 28, 2011
4,019
0
Essex
Hi Monty, I think this is such a difficult stage. When my mum used to say it wasn't her house, at first I would point at things & remind her. Over time, though, I realised that just made her more agitated.

I'd go along with whatever explanation she came up with. If she said she'd only come for a holiday, I'd say as she'd paid, she may as well get her monies worth.

Sometimes it worked to say her house was having work done.

When your mum says she doesn't live there, she knows it to be true, so you won't be able to convince her otherwise.

Go with the flow, really, it's the kindest thing to do.


Lin x
 

rajahh

Registered User
Aug 29, 2008
2,791
0
Hertfordshire
I have the same problem with my husband. Sometimes I still feel the need to say that this is our home, but generally I tell him that it is my home ( not necessarily his). He does not recognise me as his wife so he accepts that.

He often asks how much longer we are staying " here", and I just say for a few more days.

He often comments that this house hass the same things as his house, and thinks it is amazing that the neighbours here are the same as at his home too.!!!

Dementia plays such enormous tricks on him.

Jeannette
 

monty14

Registered User
Sep 19, 2013
14
0
just read the link and im afraid we have been doingit wrong. we have been trying to remind her it is her house.

so my mum sits there and says whos in my house now and when am i going home.we have been saying this is your house look all these things are yours but reading thwat we shouldnt really be doing that, but my goodness what are we suppose to say. i think maybe we have been confusing her more.

shall speak to my sisters and bother and try to do it differently.

my mum used to have a poodle and has asked recently for another dog but not sure of this is a good or bad idea. she has not had a dog for 12 yeras.