I'm caring for my Aunt who has vascular dementia; she's widowed and lives alone. She never had children of her own.
Her symptoms started around 3 years ago following a TIA; if I'm honest it was probably there before that event, you just put it down to them being old and absent minded.
Gradually she has become more than forgetful. She still waits for her husband to come home and believes her mother is still alive. She hears "men in the kitchen" at night and imagines she's had visitors during the day but doesn't know who they were. She's even forgetting who I am on occasion.
We buy her food occasionally as we're certain she isn't buying much in the way of food; we check her cupboards and fridge while we visit to make sure she's got something.
Her medications, even though they are provided by Boots in daily burst capsules, we still have to decant these into something familiar to her - otherwise she takes too many on the wrong day.
She's increasingly distressed when the slightest mishap occurs; a cupboard handle comes off and it's the end of the world!
She's conscious that something is wrong and gets worked up about it, telling me she "..never used to be like this" and "..why is this happening now?".
Yesterday I had the big talk with her about her condition, (instead of just sugar coating it) and, at the time, she took it in and realised it wasn't going to get better. She herself brought up the care home question. She recognises she can't cope well and, and although we have talked about it in the past (and she promptly forgot about it). This time there was a hint of acceptance. We talked about what furniture she could take with her and what facilities there would be at the care home. We also discussed what other arrangements we'd need; power of attorney etc..
That being said, this morning when I called her to see how she was, she had forgotten about it all together (no surprises there), but we're going to have another talk tonight after work.
So my big question is - is it too early to be moving my aunt to a care home?
Her symptoms started around 3 years ago following a TIA; if I'm honest it was probably there before that event, you just put it down to them being old and absent minded.
Gradually she has become more than forgetful. She still waits for her husband to come home and believes her mother is still alive. She hears "men in the kitchen" at night and imagines she's had visitors during the day but doesn't know who they were. She's even forgetting who I am on occasion.
We buy her food occasionally as we're certain she isn't buying much in the way of food; we check her cupboards and fridge while we visit to make sure she's got something.
Her medications, even though they are provided by Boots in daily burst capsules, we still have to decant these into something familiar to her - otherwise she takes too many on the wrong day.
She's increasingly distressed when the slightest mishap occurs; a cupboard handle comes off and it's the end of the world!
She's conscious that something is wrong and gets worked up about it, telling me she "..never used to be like this" and "..why is this happening now?".
Yesterday I had the big talk with her about her condition, (instead of just sugar coating it) and, at the time, she took it in and realised it wasn't going to get better. She herself brought up the care home question. She recognises she can't cope well and, and although we have talked about it in the past (and she promptly forgot about it). This time there was a hint of acceptance. We talked about what furniture she could take with her and what facilities there would be at the care home. We also discussed what other arrangements we'd need; power of attorney etc..
That being said, this morning when I called her to see how she was, she had forgotten about it all together (no surprises there), but we're going to have another talk tonight after work.
So my big question is - is it too early to be moving my aunt to a care home?