It is one of the really desperate things, isn't it? I still can't pass a jewellers without thinking that I'd like to buy something for Jan - then I snap into reality and realise it would be a total waste. Same applies to flowers as she can't see, smell or hold them, or even understand I have brought them for her. [I still do that though, more for myself; one's wife should always have flowers on special days!].
When I was at home caring for Jan, my Mum would ask at Christmas, or around her birthday "what would Jan like? What can I get her?". She would get mad when I said "nothing much, really, maybe some chocolates". Equally at that stage I would say the same of me - "there's nothing I want other than my wife back, as she was"
It's a bummer, but these days, a portion of a Mr Kipling cake becomes a present, and I can see Jan does enjoy that [though not the past few days as she seems to have declined a bit more].
Why do presents have to be 'something'?
Dementia is the great leveller, and all the gloss of our 'civilisation' is as nothing to these people. Surely a hug, an extra visit, a chocolate, a smile, not showing how upset we are when they are 'difficult' [ie when they are trying unsuccessfully to understand their world], etc - surely these are just as valid as anything else...perhaps more so. We can buy material things without needing to think too much. To provide a gift of some sort for these people takes real thought and understanding.
I'm off. I've started talking rot again. Sorry!