At last mum has turned a corner. She was very awake and lucid today, chest under control for a little while. She was extremely bored, I rang the day care place that I like and they said to bring her down. She had a lovely day, came back in great form, had her hair done, and the manager has offered me respite. Yippee, the little people have forgiven me. Thank you.
Dear Magic, so very, very pleased for you both. It's been a real struggle for you lately. Sounds like things are definately on the up! Make sure you put a bevy out for the little people tonight to keep em sweet! Lotsaluv, She. XX
Thanks everyone. Mum is in great form at the moment, very happy and as healthy as she's been in a long time. I hope it continues. It's so hard to see her in pain EVERY day.
Thanks for all your support guys, you're the best! I really could not cope without all your wise words and encouragement. I'm always wary about good times but I think it's best just to grab the moment with both hands these days. I think it's the only way we carers can be.
I have the same thing with my grandparents. For years when I was young my grandad always said he was 21 when anyone asked his age and I think I believed it until I myself reached 21, as he was such a vibrant, fun-loving person.
There are snippets of this personality still now but very few and far between moments. At the moment he is using a zimmer frame and sleeps a lot but won't believe he can do any less than anyone else.
One day after he was told to wait in the house whilst my nan walked a friend to the bus stop, my mum and I came into their house to find him gone! We became very worried as it was dark outside and there is little street lighting. We searched everywhere and finally found him half way down the street bringing my nan back, hobbling on his zimmer. He said that he doesn't like my (very able bodied) nan to be walking on her own at night as someone could attack her! - we did all wonder what on earth my grandad was capable of doing to a possible assailant, and he said as if we were crazy, "Just feel these muscles, I used to be a boxer you know!" He is 85.
On a more serious note (and I appreciate this probably isn't the topic for it) we have been for ages trying to stop my Grandma who has trouble walking and is very frail from wandering around at all times with large amounts of money in her purse. I brought it up recently, and my Grandad, trying to labour the point said "Yes, there were two people from this place got mugged last week, weren't there?" to my Grandma. She agreed, and said how terrible it was, but then added, to me "but you know why they get mugged...it's because they're old, poor souls". That's the first time in my life I have been speechless!
I know how you feel,I go out alone now twice a week and I miss Peg all the timeI'm away from her.
I think we should be together not living like this,and I resent the happy couples that I see.
I feel relieved when I get home to her and then it all starts again.
It really is a day to day isn't it Connie?
very best Wishes
I have put mum in respite a few times now and will be maybe doing so again next week. I always miss her when she isn't here (except the sundowning which I find incredibley wearing) and I sometimes cry on my twice daily visits when she's in there. It's just this illness, it is such a sad ailment and as far as I'm concerned when a person gets alzheimer's or dementia, the nearest and dearest has it too, all be it in different symptoms. Your feelings of sadness are perfectly normal and they won't go away. I think behind it we carers feel guilty putting our loved ones in respite, as it feels like a betrayal of sorts, but is very necessary if we are to carry on keeping them at home for as long as we possibly can.
Try to enjoy just a little of the me time, it will do Lionel good too when you are refreshed. It also makes us appreciate that we miss the person, as a person and not as the dementia sufferer we have to look after, if you know what I mean!
Relax a little, respite will be over all too soon.
Dear Magic, youv'e got it in a nutshell! It is so hard, but as you say, the only way to keep going. Connie, take care, try to do as Magic suggests, have a bit of me time, it's not selfish, even if it feels like it, it gives you the strength to go on. Love She. XX
Today the younger son his wife and three granddaughters came.
1O years old and the twins aged 7.
We went out for a Sunday lunch and what a joy it was to be with them,sad to part,they live at Harpenden,long way away.
Peg had forgotten in ten minutes but the girls love her so much and she enjoyed the time together.
Norman, it is so lovely to 'hear' the happiness in your post - youngsters are such a joy with their natural approach to life, and I hope they realise how much you need their support and their visits.
Hope you head into the new week with a spring in your step and a smile on your face.
My highlight of the day: My new puppy..... 'Jasper'...
We lost our 13 year old English Bull Terrier/ Jack Russell Cross to cancer just over a week after my mum in law came to live with us in Jan 2003. I won't go into details, but I can honestly say that, to date, it was the worst week of my life.
As a direct result of the help and advice I recieved from Talking Point, I finally felt that I was back in control of my life. I was on a 'high' anyway..... and then we had the chance to have a puppy.....
What a differance a little 8 week old Jack Russell puppy can make...
I can honestly say that for the first time in 22 months, I actually feel 'happy'...
I am going to try to post a piccy... he was 6 weeks old when this photo was taken and is a lot bigger now....but is still as cute...