What to say and what to do...

SmogTheCat

Registered User
Sep 1, 2005
45
Italy
Hello to everybody,
my Mum and I are very confused about Antonietta situation.
We know that is Alzheimer fault but we need some advises about what to say and what to do to Antonietta when we visit her at nursing home.
We visit her a couple of times a week for about one hour each time.
If I visit her alone, she talk a little with me then she says "You have to drive a lot to go home. Let's go, it's late... go to your Mum" and take me to the door.
When I visit her with my Mum (generally we go together) she talk only with her or with me. I bet she isn't able to speak with to two or more people at the same time. But this is not a problem, I know it's Alzheimer fault.
The problem is that since 3 or 4 weeks she is telling no-sense things and we don't know how to reply to her strange questions...
Other people told us she is angry and lots of time she ask to go home.
I remember when she was at home, sometimes she asked the same time "I want to go home":confused:
I noticed she remember facts about some times ago, for example she is asking a lot about her Mum, her Dad, her old house and village where she lived before married my Grandfather...
 

Margarita

Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
10,824
london
Have you tried kind like changing the conversation ,when she ask about going home could you say what was your home like ? ask her open
Question like what , how , did, so it leads to question that she may open up & talk about her past in what happen what was it like , so your listening going in to a journey in to her past , as you ask more open question , I do this with my mum


My son is called Anthony my mum call him AntoniettO , never heard it called Antonietta it sound lovely
 

SmogTheCat

Registered User
Sep 1, 2005
45
Italy
Thanks for tour advices.
Sometimes I tried to ask her "where is your house? How it is" and she told me "I don't remember. I want to go home to see my house because I don't remember how it is"
So... what can I reply when she told that? :confused:


Her real name is "Antonia" but everybody has always called her "Antonietta" (like "little Antonia") and I always called her "Anonietta Gnadmother"
 

Margarita

Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
10,824
london
I want to go home to see my house because I don't remember how it is"




could you say .......As soon as you remember tell me, because I don’t remember also so don’t know how to get there , oh dear I do have a bad memory , lets go for a walk & maybe we remember together , did you have lots of boyfriends before you married granddad ? or did you go dancing a lot or maybe mum remember what the house was like ? maybe she like us & can't remeber also , Maybe one night when your sleeping your have a dream about it & you can tell us what it was like
 
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