What might she be saying?

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by usedup, Dec 1, 2015.

  1. usedup

    usedup Registered User

    Aug 5, 2014
    West Berkshire
    The writings about dementia speak of a person forgetting the normal words to speak and finding different words that seem meaningless to others. Does anyone have clues about how to interpret what is said? This morning I finally realised that "over there" might mean the kitchen in our flat where we have meals. The dining room in this retirement village is certainly "over there". If I could learn dementia-speak it might reduce the stress for both of us.
  2. Optomistic

    Optomistic Registered User

    Jul 24, 2014
    My husband has Alzheimers it affects his speech and memory. The worst part is understanding what he is saying. Some days are better than others but i can work out what he is trying to tell me after awhile. He wont chat with strangers as he is embaressed that they wont understand.
  3. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    Yes, trying to understand is frustrating, and it took me a while to be able to translate various phrases, but it will come. Blessings to you both xxxxxx
  4. sleepless

    sleepless Registered User

    Feb 19, 2010
    The Sweet North
    My husband can sometimes have a conversation wherein he uses quite complex sentences, and though what he is saying bears no relevance to the here and now, it is good to hear.
    A lot of the time though, I can't make out what he means, and he often whispers too, but it is possible to hear the inference in his voice, and know how to respond. Best of all though is when he has obviously said something amusing and starts laughing, because it is so easy to laugh with him, for the simple pleasure of sharing laughter is infectious.
    You may be able to pick up the meaning of phrases, but they may not remain the same for long, but the best of luck. The main thing is to keep talking.
  5. Trisha4

    Trisha4 Registered User

    Jan 16, 2014
    My husband often uses 'car' or 'dog' to mean any noun. If I know the context I can usually translate Alzheimer's speak but if he introduces a new topic I can struggle which he finds very frustrating and thinks I'm being awkward.

    Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
  6. esmeralda

    esmeralda Registered User

    Nov 27, 2014
    It is so sad to lose the communication isn't it. My husband started a sentence several times last night, saying he wanted to 'book'. I tried guessing, dinner? a holiday? No. In the end I asked if it was animal, vegetable or mineral and he said 'animal'. It turned out he was saying he would like us to get another dog. Most times we never get to the point though.
    You're right sleepless, it's lovely to still be able to laugh together.
    You're working so hard to help your husband in this difficult situation usedup.
  7. Suzanna1969

    Suzanna1969 Registered User

    Mar 28, 2015
    As a child I could always hear my Mum chatting to her friends, laughing, joking, when the phone rang and it was her sister or one of her friends it'd be 'oh NOOOO she'll be on the phone for HOURS now!'


    It's so cruel that this condition has robbed her of so many of her defining characteristics.

    I can usually get what she is trying to say and if I can't I get her to SHOW me, that usually works. Dad, 88 and with Parkinson's, finds it much more difficult though and gets frustrated. Then she says 'Never mind' and gives up.

    It's heartbreaking because she was such a sociable person. I know she is embarrassed by not being able to find the words and she often just listens to the conversation going on around her or, increasingly, zones out, despite my efforts to draw her in to the chat.

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