What is "Relaxed State"

[blue4ever]

Mum has had two bouts of terrible wheezing/coughing and struggling to breath - once in the Nursing home and afterwards when she was transferred to hospital.

The hospital called us all in thinking she might pass away as her oxygen levels were too low and heartbeat too high.

She recovered however distressing it was.

The hospital rang to say they have now got mum medically optimised.

Which I understand as they have got rid of the breathing problems maybe Pneumonia.

But, they keep stressing that it will probably happen again and we might think about a different approach if it happens in the future.

They think mum would be too frail to be admitted in the future and it might be better if she was put into a relaxed state if it happened again.

I couldn't bring myself to ask what that actually meant.

But I thinking they would sedate her and let her drift away, instead of suffering any more.

Could anyone confirm if I've understood correctly and if we wanted this to happen would we let the GP know our wishes?

Thank you for your help during this terrible time.

 

[Grannie G]

I think you are correct @blue4ever

I have tried to search for the real meaning but can`t find anything appropriate for your mother. I can only think she may be sedated to ease her suffering. It must be very frightening for her to struggle to breathe, and for you, to witness it.

It is indeed a terrible time for you and I hope your mother will be helped to be comfortable and painfree. It`s all anyone can ask at this stage.

 

[blue4ever]

I think you are correct @blue4ever

I have tried to search for the real meaning but can`t find anything appropriate for your mother. I can only think she may be sedated to ease her suffering. It must be very frightening for her to struggle to breathe, and for you, to witness it.

It is indeed a terrible time for you and I hope your mother will be helped to be comfortable and painfree. It`s all anyone can ask at this stage.

Thanks @Grannie G - you're right.

Do you think the Nursing Home would be able to do this for us - I think Mum's going to be taken back in the next day or two.

Or - would it be better to transfer her to a hospice, if that's possible? Thanks again

 

[Grannie G]

If the nursing home knows of your wishes @blue4ever I`m sure the doctor will be informed and be able to provide the best medication to keep your mother pain free and comfortable.

When my husband was at the end of his life and struggled with pain and also to breathe, a syringe driver was in place and the district nurse was contacted to set it up.

The syringe driver administers regular doses of prescribed medication so there are no mistakes.

My heart goes out to you. It`s the worst time.

 

[Duggies-girl]

@blue4ever dad became very frail towards the end and it was agreed that he would not be admitted to hospital again. He had a similar event to that of your mum and we were called in to say goodbye but he recovered and was allowed home with me looking after him. Dad lived another year in his own home with me and passed away peacefully at home. We had a syringe driver but it was never needed. I am sure that the nursing home should be able to deal with it.

I am very sorry that your mum has reached this stage.

 

[lemonbalm]

Hello @blue4ever

My mum (91) was in hospital on oxygen for three days in May after choking and was discharged back to her care home for"end of life" treatment. The hospital staff were astonished that she made it.

The care home now has a supply of "use as needed" injectable medication and also "syringe driver" medication for her. They are not a nursing home but there is an end of life team for the area and a nurse comes to administer any medication required, day or night. They have called the nurse out once so far to administer some of the "as needed" medication when mum became agitated overnight and was struggling to breathe. I would think that your mum's nursing home would be able to look after your mum. It's a tough time but I hope that your mum is as comfortable as possible. Better for her to be in a familiar environment with carers she knows. My mum's care home manager said "we'll provide the love and the nurse will provide the medication".

 

[Shedrech]

hi @blue4ever
please do talk with the hospital staff and ask them anything that is on your mind as wondering and worrying is doing no good for your peace of mind
if you think you might forget what you want to say maybe make a note of thoughts and questions as they come to you so you have something to refer to, and make a note of their replies so you can look over them later