1. kaz3565

    kaz3565 Registered User

    Jun 15, 2006
    5
    scotland
    Hi to everyone,
    I'm new here looking for some advice. My mum has had alzheimers for the past 6 years, she is 85 years old and recently was taken into hospital for assessment. My dad who is also 85 is missing her very much and just wants her back home (they have been together for over 60 years) yesterday we were invited to mum's review at hospital, it was clear to me that they dont think she should be going back home as she did quite a bit of wandering when at home with my dad. They are going to assess her on road safety for the possibility of returning home.
    At the end of the review the social worker mentioned about getting gaurdianship, can someone tell me what this is?

    Many thanks
    Karen
     
  2. Lynne

    Lynne Registered User

    Jun 3, 2005
    3,433
    Suffolk,England
    Hi Kaz

    Welcome to Talking Point, and if you browse around I'm sure you will find lots of information here which will be helpful, if sometimes frightening!

    I know that sometimes Scottish Law differs from English Law, so I am not too sure what Guardianship might mean (in Law) where you are. I have found the Citizens' Advice Bureau very helpful with advising me on things like setting up an Enduring Power of Attorney for my Mum, so perhaps they could help you.

    Also, Scotland has its own Alzheimer's Society website, www.alzscot.org so they may be another port of call for you.

    I'm not "sending you away" from this forum though, and hope you'll continue to post here, and educate us (well, :eek: me anyway) about how it's done north of the border.

    Regards
     
  3. mumof3

    mumof3 Registered User

    Feb 6, 2006
    82
    Hi Karen

    Lynne has done the important bit directing you to the Alzheimer Scotland site. We also live in Scotland and have recently organised welfare and financial powers of attorney for my MIL. The Social Worker also mentioned applying for guardianship to us in the event that my MIL was unable to understand what POA meant. Thankfully the solicitor that we used and who knew my MIL previously was of the opinion that she was capable of understanding and signing the POA.

    I think for guardianship your application has to be vetted by a sheriff and there are more safeguards built in to the system - don't quote me though! All the info you need is documented in sections 1 to 8 of the money and legal matters section Alzheimer Scotland site http://www.alzscot.org/pages/info/mandleg.htm
     
  4. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    Hi just like to say welcome to TP sounds like you were given great advice already :)

    Let us know when you say
    Is your Dad in good heath ?
     
  5. kaz3565

    kaz3565 Registered User

    Jun 15, 2006
    5
    scotland
    Thanks, i've been reading and reading but cant seem to take it all in :( .......soooo stressed out after yesterday's visit, think the social worker meant them getting guardianship???? wish i didnt feel so low.

    Karen xx
     
  6. kaz3565

    kaz3565 Registered User

    Jun 15, 2006
    5
    scotland
    Hi Margarita,
    My dad's health is not very good, he has had 4 heart attacks over the past 5 years, also his sight is not very good.
    Karen xx
     
  7. mumof3

    mumof3 Registered User

    Feb 6, 2006
    82
    I know how you feel Karen. I did lots and lots of reading initially too as the information we received from the first SW my MIL was allocated was limited to say the least. Now I am reading the same info and actually taking some of it in as I now feel able to make sense of some of it. It is simply too overwhelming to start with. All we wanted to know was how this awful disease would progress but all the SW and CPN asked was if we had POA arranged. They were no practical help for this though.

    I hope that your mum has been allocated a "good" SW and that you will all get the help you need. Just try to make sure that when your mum's need are assessed they are aware of all your dad's and your own circumstances. It does sound as if your Dad would need lots of support at home if it were possible for your mum to return home. Heartbreaking after 60 years together.

    You have come to the right place with TP. Everyone is friendly and will always point you in the right direction for info etc. Even more important there will always be someone here for you if you feel a bit low or like having a rant. Best of luck and keep posting.
     
  8. Amy

    Amy Registered User

    Jan 4, 2006
    3,453
    Hiya Karen and welcome to TP, you seem to have been given some very good advice - personally I had never heard of guardianship. You talk about assessing your mum on road safety, would it be possible to make her home/ garden secure? We had to padlock the gate to stop mum wandering off.
    It sounds though as your dad may well be struggling to care for your mum. Do you feel that is the case, or do you think that they can still cope at home? What do you want to happen? What do you think is best for your mum, your dad, and you?
    Love Helen
     
  9. shauny

    shauny Registered User

    Oct 27, 2005
    57
    north-east england
    guardianship

    Hi Kaz im a social worker who uses TP as a guide in my various dealings with clients who have alzheimers. I have arranged guardianships before, but it depends on individual circumstances. U must ask the social worker why they want to consider it? keep me posted here and i will offer u advice accordingly. Shauny.
     
  10. kaz3565

    kaz3565 Registered User

    Jun 15, 2006
    5
    scotland
    Hi Helen, Good point about making the garden secure, that could certainly help. Dad locked the doors once to stop her wandering off and she was trying to climb out the windows!! Yes dad is struggling, In a way i'd like to see her home with him for the simple reason he's finding it very hard to come to terms with her being in hospital, but on the other hand i'm not sure it would be the right thing. I'ts heartbreaking right enough.

    Karen

    To shauny
    Thanks, we will certainly ask sw this. They mentioned something about,, if a SW had gaurdianship then mum might be more willing to accept community help etc (if at home) "she might listen more to someone with a bit of authority rather than a family member" i think were the words they used. We are just a bit confused as to what guardianship entails. Please keep in touch.

    Karen
     
  11. Lynne

    Lynne Registered User

    Jun 3, 2005
    3,433
    Suffolk,England
    Maybe I'm cynical and sceptical (well, perhaps there's no Maybe about it!) but I don't like the sound of that!
    Bears further investigation (with someone other than the SW) before you agree to it, I think.

    Well yes, my Mum takes more notice of the doctor than of me, even if I have already said the same thing, 100 times, that he is now telling her. Her generation were brought up to have respect for professional people.
     
  12. mumof3

    mumof3 Registered User

    Feb 6, 2006
    82
    Morning Karen - just a quick post as I am on my way out to nursery but from my understanding I think it would be quite unusual (and probably undesirable) for a SW to have guardianship over your mum's affairs where she obviously has loving and involved family around her. There is both Welfare and Financial Guardianship and it would probably be best to arrange both. If it is like POA you can have two names eg your dad and yourself.

    Perhaps shauny can advise better but my understanding is that you can arrange (welfare and financial) POA's if your mum understands what this means and is happy to do so, or if it is judged that your mum doesn't understand what this means, then (welfare and/or financial) guardianship can be applied for.

    Just my opinion but I would be far happier if I thought that my family were making decisions for me based on what they knew I would want and what was in my best interests. JUst don't think I would be on the same wavelength as your mum's SW on this one.

    I would just do the reading and decide what would be best and most practical in all your circumstances.
     
  13. mumof3

    mumof3 Registered User

    Feb 6, 2006
    82
    #13 mumof3, Jun 16, 2006
    Last edited: Jun 16, 2006
    Hi Lynne - great minds and all that.................

    Karen, I really don't understand the SW's reasoning behind this one. Can't see what positive difference them having the piece of paper would make. Yes our parent's generation may be more disposed to take a GP's or health professionals word as law but the SW is presumably not going to be waving the guardianship papers around as she puts her point of view across - very odd me thinks.

    Having thought a bit more, I am presuming that the SW was talking only about welfare guardianship. I can think of numerous practical difficulties if they were also meaning financial guardianship eg. paying bills, cheque signing, financial decisions. I know what my response would be. Surely this would be a last resort for someone with no close family around them?

    I know your head must be spinning right now but I would advise you ring the Alzheimer Scotland helpline in the first instance and seek advice.
     

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