What I Found When Clearing Out Dad's Room

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by MaNaAk, Jul 6, 2019.

  1. MaNaAk

    MaNaAk Registered User

    Jun 19, 2016
    1,243
    Essex
    Hello again!

    Just letting you all know that we have cleared out dad's room at the care home. I found quite a few items that I don't recognise and also I will be returning the shirt that dad wore when he went into hospital as I don't recognise it. I will also be collecting the photos that they took of him and at some point I will be playing the violin there again.

    Also, Lovedadbut dad accumulated one or two female clothes items and a walking sitck with the name Barbara on it and he was happy to see resident M walking around with his stick!

    MaNaAk
     
  2. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    10,237
    Female
    South coast
    I found similar stuff when i cleared mums room too.
    People with dementia have a rather fluid notion of ownership......
     
  3. MaNaAk

    MaNaAk Registered User

    Jun 19, 2016
    1,243
    Essex
    I know this could be the carers making a mistake but dad has been known to walk into other people's rooms so I have my suspicions!

    MaNaAk
     
  4. Jaded'n'faded

    Jaded'n'faded Registered User

    Jan 23, 2019
    426
    Female
    High Peak
    Beautifully put!

    I've just had a call from mum's home to say mama has been spotted with a phone and did I know anything about it. (i.e. if not she must have appropriated someone else's phone...)

    Well, yes, she did have an old flip top phone (matching the carer's description) when she moved in 2 and a half years ago. But I haven't seen it since then, it hasn't been charged since then and I very much hope they don't enable her to use it! We shall see...
     
  5. MaNaAk

    MaNaAk Registered User

    Jun 19, 2016
    1,243
    Essex
    What I would like to know what she would have been talking about and who she would have been talking too?

    MaNaAk
     
  6. Jaded'n'faded

    Jaded'n'faded Registered User

    Jan 23, 2019
    426
    Female
    High Peak
    Believe me, you don't want to know! She often tells me she's been on the phone all morning (no, she hasn't) usually to complain about the men who come in to put the marker on and have left her without any coats (??) or to the hospital because her father (mum is 87!) has had an accident and 'they' won't tell her where he is. Or she has to cancel her order because the ones they sent were not the same and the metal thing that you push to make the cricket ball didn't work....

    That's generally the sort of thing she 'needs' a phone for :rolleyes:o_O
     
  7. MaNaAk

    MaNaAk Registered User

    Jun 19, 2016
    1,243
    Essex
    This has lightened up my day. Before dad went into the home I rang our number to inform him that I was on my way home and the response was thus:

    Dad: "Hello! J here"

    MaNaAk: Hello dad! It's MaNaAk"

    Dad: "Hello! J here"

    MaNaAk: "It's me dad"

    Dad: "Hello! J here"

    MaNaAk: "It me dad. I just want to let you know that I am on my way home"

    Dad: "Hello! J here"

    MaNaAk
     
  8. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    10,237
    Female
    South coast
    That sounds like the sort of conversations I used to have with my mum @MaNaAk
    It became pretty obvious that she was just talking into the phone and had no understanding that there was another person at the other end.
     
  9. MaNaAk

    MaNaAk Registered User

    Jun 19, 2016
    1,243
    Essex
    Dear Canary,

    I think I may have told you this next memory before. In the care home the carers used to set aside a separate table for diabetics and for a while this worked well for dad. However they decided to put him on another table when it became too noisy.

    This table of diabetics consisted of resident B, resident J and dad who were all deaf and two of them with dementia. Resident talking at the top of her voice to two people who also spoke at the tops of their voices in different time zones. It was impossible for everyone else to relax because these three would draw attention to themselves!

    MaNaAk
     
  10. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    10,237
    Female
    South coast
    No, Ive not heard that story before
    I can just imagine it LOL
     
  11. MaNaAk

    MaNaAk Registered User

    Jun 19, 2016
    1,243
    Essex
    Dear Canary,

    If they were in a pub they could be thought of as drunk and disorderly but as it was the carers decided that it was so noisy that they thought it would be a good idea to put dad at another table.

    MaNaAk
     

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