1. Teanosugar

    Teanosugar Registered User

    Apr 28, 2012
    107
    Stockport
    My father was diagnosed with vascular dementia more than 7 years ago, but in reality we know he started with this a few years before. At first he just needed sheltered housing as was having so many falls, hallucinations, increasing frailness and lots of problems. I fought for him, eventually he had a crisis and had to go into emergency respite while he was further assessed. He had had similar episodes, with GP, hospital etc all being involved, I was in regular touch with his social worker, always having to fight for everything, but this time it was me who could not cope, I had reached the end of my emotional tether and broke down and phoned emergency social worker and everything swung into action. Up to this point, I had tried to cope, and have to say social services were more than happy to let me and every hour of care had to be fought for by me. Anyway the result was they decided very quickly that my dad was in danger living in this way, I was not in a position to move dad to be with me as my house was not suitable, I worked full time and I have health issues of my own.

    Dad went into an EMI care home and for more than 2 years has lived there. His dementia has progressed so far he now has no idea who I am (his only child), he is getting thinner though until recently he ate well, he falls all the time, one week he had 4 falls and went to A and E each time, has broken his shoulder and his collar bone, been covered in bruises so bad it looked like he had been beaten up but his anxiety and aggression is getting much worse. He has been on several medications and a few months ago went onto promazine, which has since been increased.

    Yesterday dad had another fall, he was so bad it took paramedics more than 2 hours to actually get him calm enough to go to hospital, he was like a raging bull (all 6 stone of him!), threatening to bite people, hitting out, screaming, crying, swearing (dad never swore in his life) and making death threats. He was so agitated in the ambulance again, and then at hospital they could do nothing to calm him, said he needed a CT scan but he was in no state to have this, and that they did not feel it was safe to sedate him to the point he would need this due to his other health conditions of heart, TIAs etc etc. Dad came home from the hospital back to the care home and now we have to have an emergency meeting to discuss how we are going to manage dad from now on. I am advised it is most likely dad will need a nursing home from now on. This leaves me wondering if dad is so agitated so often, becoming violent with his aggression physically, will any home accept him? What on earth will we do if they wont? This aggression has been getting worse over the last few months but yesterday was the worst we have seen. Just wondered if any of you helpful people had experienced a move from care home to nursing home with vascular dementia type physical aggression and was it a problem? Thanks for listening, sorry to go on, it feels like groundhog day, this dementia roundabout is getting me down, I want to get off but cant as dad has nobody else to speak up for him and I have power of attorney over his health and well being.
     
  2. pamann

    pamann Registered User

    Oct 28, 2013
    2,635
    Kent
    What next?

    Nello Teanosugar
    So sorry you are having such a bad time with your father, its so difficult when you are an only child no support for you.
    My opinion would be he will need to go into a nursing home they are trained to look after people with aagression, my husbands Aunt is in a home they sedate her as she bites and punches the carers, l am sure other TP members will be along to give you some advice ♥♥♥

    Sent from my GT-P5210 using Talking Point mobile app
     
  3. Teanosugar

    Teanosugar Registered User

    Apr 28, 2012
    107
    Stockport
    Thanks for reply x
     

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