What does she think I am?

[Fastwalker]

I went to see my new GP yesterday. I had been two weeks ago just before my mum died to register and she wanted to see my notes so asked me to go back. The appointment was to discuss an appeal to the CCG for laser surgery to remove bumps from a neurological condition I suffer from.

My mum died on 22nd November and she asked about this. She then suggested that I was very matter of fact! I then felt justified to tell her that I was upset. I have no brothers and sisters and am single probably due to the way I look! I have dealt with homes, GPs and hospitals on my own for nearly five years. I am very upset. What a funny thing to say to someone. I was upset when dozy J*** my mums only cousin wouldn't come in the car and when she said she would only come to the service. I was upset when I was ordered back to work by the temping agency this Monday before the funeral subsequently I refused until next Monday with my employers agreement.

I cant get upset because my mum is released from dementia and is with my dad. She will have found a choir to conduct and will not be doubly incontinent and immobile. I get upset about things like dozy J*** and work. Things that my mum would have been upset by.

I

 

[Quilty]

I went to see my new GP yesterday. I had been two weeks ago just before my mum died to register and she wanted to see my notes so asked me to go back. The appointment was to discuss an appeal to the CCG for laser surgery to remove bumps from a neurological condition I suffer from.

My mum died on 22nd November and she asked about this. She then suggested that I was very matter of fact! I then felt justified to tell her that I was upset. I have no brothers and sisters and am single probably due to the way I look! I have dealt with homes, GPs and hospitals on my own for nearly five years. I am very upset. What a funny thing to say to someone. I was upset when dozy J*** my mums only cousin wouldn't come in the car and when she said she would only come to the service. I was upset when I was ordered back to work by the temping agency this Monday before the funeral subsequently I refused until next Monday with my employers agreement.

I cant get upset because my mum is released from dementia and is with my dad. She will have found a choir to conduct and will not be doubly incontinent and immobile. I get upset about things like dozy J*** and work. Things that my mum would have been upset by.

I

Dear Fastwalker, no-one else in the world has any right to judge you or tell you how you feel. You will grieve the way you need to , when you need to. Its easy of others looking in to imagine how you must feel but they can never know. You lost your Mum a little each day until there was just a shell left. You loved her and cared for her single handed. Well done. We are proud of you.

 

[sistermillicent]

What a silly thing for the doctor to say, how insensitive.
I wish I could do more than send you a big hug over the internet, you certainly sound as if you need it, and I agree with quilty, we are all proud of you.

 

[Grannie G]

What a crass comment Fastwalker. Your GP needs to learn some social and compassionate skills.

I hope you can put that comment behind you and be prepared with an appropriate response should your GP even be so insensitive again.

 

[Fastwalker]

Thank you for your replies. I will think of an answer next time I go to see her. (hopefully I wont need to see this lady and will choose another GP)! I was upset in a nice way picking the music for the crematorium. Perhaps I will have to save all these instances up to tell her!

 

[love.dad.but..]

What an twit and yet another health professional who doesn't understand the devastating impact dementia has on those who care for their very much loved relative gripped by this vile illness.