What do I do if ..........

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by Cliff, Jan 30, 2008.

  1. Cliff

    Cliff Registered User

    Jun 29, 2007
    777
    North Wales
    Some time ago I posted my concern about what if I was very ill and what would happen to Dee.

    I spoke to my GP today and feel reassured. She is very clear in her mind that, in such an event, Social Services would be involved by the appropriate doctor and are duty bound to act. This is despite my recent experience when SS refused to help apart from telling me look in the lists of homes already supplied by them. And she reassured me that the Doctor would be truly involved in all of this.

    If in the unlikely event that a Home bed was not immediately available then Dee would be hospitalised so that she was not left to cope alone – which she cannot.

    Also I carry a card and a necktag with a phone number and a reference number relating to Dee and her circumstances. This is a scheme involving the Red Cross and the Council so I assume this links into our brilliant Care Phone system.

    Hope this is helpul to others who may have wondered about this and it would be good to hear of other people's experiences or thoughts.
     
  2. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,895
    Kent
    Dear Cliff.

    I have neglected to make any of these enquiries, I`m just going along blindly, trying not to think too much of the future or of `what if`s. I`m not in denial, [I hope] but living `one day at a time`.

    So thank you for identifying these needs. I shall ask our GP what the situation would be if I were ill or hospitalized and I`ll make enquiries about Care Line.

    Love xx
     
  3. Nutty Nan

    Nutty Nan Registered User

    Nov 2, 2003
    787
    Buckinghamshire
    Dear Cliff,
    I think in an emergency, Social Services would get involved and would take over. In less drastic circumstances (i.e. the carer being unwell with something like 'flu), the situation is probably more tricky, as we all try to keep going.

    My emergency occurred last year, in the shape of a 'phone call from my father in Switzerland one Sunday evening, urging me to 'come home immediately', as my mother was gravely ill. My husband has AD and is fully dependent on me, and he was already in bed asleep.......
    My first telephone call was to the Social Services Emergency Team, and within 4 hours they had located an emergency respite bed. I burnt the midnight oil packing cases and writing long lists of notes. By 7am we were on our way to the care home, I continued from there to the airport and by 3pm I joined the rest of the family to be with my Mum one last time.
    The CPN also visited my husband at the care home while I was away.

    I hope others will post similar positive experiences.
     
  4. Cliff

    Cliff Registered User

    Jun 29, 2007
    777
    North Wales
    #4 Cliff, Jan 31, 2008
    Last edited: Jan 31, 2008
    Thank you Nutty Nan, and am sorry to hear of your sad experience.
    Do hope your Dad is stable after that awful time.

    That is completely different to my experience before Christmas when I was in a desperate situation and may have needed to go to London alone to deal with a very serious family situation - a death.

    The SS said they could not help - zero. My savings are greater than their limit and I am ruled out of such help.

    Your location is identified, ie England, and I would like to use, with your permission, your experience to question my SW why she said no. I am in Wales but our help is usually better than you have in England.

    May I do this please, and of course would not use any names/nicknames ?

    I hope more will post their experiences.

    Thank you so much for posting,
     
  5. Nutty Nan

    Nutty Nan Registered User

    Nov 2, 2003
    787
    Buckinghamshire
    Dear Cliff,
    Feel free to pass on my experience.
    I don't think the question of funding should come into it in an emergency: at worst, they could ask you to cover costs afterwards. There are times when money is not a priority, and in the case of a carer being taken ill or having an accident, the main issue must be the care of the dependent patient. As far as I am aware, Social Services would become responsible for a 'vulnerable person' if a carer/partner/spouse could not (or would not!) continue as a carer.

    Let's hope none of us ever have to put the system to the test!

    Best wishes, and keep us posted.
     
  6. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    1,213
    south lanarkshire
    Hi Cliff

    I am in Scotland, but as I understand things, if the carer isn't available, then SS have to provide care.

    I was told this and I was only going to a wedding, where I had to stay overnight. SS said if no one was available to care for my parents, then they had to provide care, so they arranged respite.

    Love
    Alfjess
     
  7. Cliff

    Cliff Registered User

    Jun 29, 2007
    777
    North Wales
    Thank you ladies,

    What you say confirms my GP's response, that SS are obliged to help.

    I will write to SS and ask them why I wasn't offered help in my imminent emergency involving the death of a relative. It was suprising as our Council are normally very helpful. When I get a reply. I'll post it.

    Love to you both,
     
  8. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    I never not commented before because your self funded , We not .

    So was wondering if the rules where different, so was waiting to hear what your doctor said .

    As I have had emergency respite when my mother sister had a stroke , had to fly out as soon as possibly , so SS organized it within 2 days .

    I am wondering if its because you have to come to an agreement that in an emergency you have to foot the bill afterwards .

    Have you ever spoken to SS who foot the bill in an emergency respite ? May be that they issue with it all .
     
  9. Cliff

    Cliff Registered User

    Jun 29, 2007
    777
    North Wales
    Dear Margarita,

    Am fairly sure that during my phone conversation with my SW I mentioned settling the costs afterwards. But was so annoyed with her for refusing to help in any way, maybe I didn't.

    Any way my letter to the SS will be polite and I will raise the point you make about entering into an agreement about paying. It will be interesting to read what they have to say. As I said, I am suprised because we have quite a well meaning council.

    Good to hear from you,

    Love,
     
  10. jenniferpa

    jenniferpa Volunteer Moderator

    Jun 27, 2006
    39,438
    This is just speculation on my part but I wondering if they treat people differently based on whether the person you need to get to is or is not alive. That is - if it's a question of getting to someone's death-bed they'll provide emergency respite, but if it's a question of dealing with a funeral they won't.
     
  11. Cliff

    Cliff Registered User

    Jun 29, 2007
    777
    North Wales
    Thank you Jenny,

    You have a point, but I felt that my case shut and nailed down - maybe she was having a bad morning but - I don't know.

    We'll find out,
     
  12. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    1,213
    south lanarkshire
    Hi Jennifer and Clive

    I was only going to a wedding. SS could have argued I didn't have to go.
    It certainly wasn't an emergency, so therefore I would say, if a carer tells SS that they are definately not available from xx to xx dates then SS cannot then deny care, they are obliged to provide care, if a care user has been assessed as needing care.
    Sorry if this answer seems confused, but hopefully you'll know what I mean
    love
    Alfjess
     

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