Mum is living with me now after a bad fall when she lived on her own. I do not have time to sit with her all day and other family cannot easily get to me because of the Covid-19 situation. She is looking for me all the time. Are there any ideas of activities I can give her for a short to medium term time that would be beneficial to her and occupy her? She has mixed dementia - vascular dementia and Alzheimer's. She does not like music and no longer seems to enjoy watching tv.
What can keep mum occupied for short to medium periods of time?
- Thread starter The Reas
- Start date
Hello @The Reas and welcome to TP.
Sadly many people with mixed or indeed any type of dementia lose enjoyment of things they used to like. My Mum likes looking at pictures of birds, so with some misgivings we got books designed for children, with pictures of birds and simple text. I worried she would not like them as she would see them as something for children, but she wasn't bothered and retained an ability to read simple text that I thought she had lost.
Others have found that their PWD enjoy sorting - e.g. a tray with screws, buttons etc of different shapes and colours. It doesn't matter if not much actual sorting takes place. Others enjoy folding - laundry, tea cloths etc. Mummy used to like polishing shoes, rather surprisingly, but this had to be supervised. I think I have heard other forum members mention colouring books and winding wool onto a spool. The activity doesnt have to have a practical application but sometimes repetitive movement (knitting etc if able) can be soothing.
Looking at old photo albums can also be therapeutic.
Sadly many people with mixed or indeed any type of dementia lose enjoyment of things they used to like. My Mum likes looking at pictures of birds, so with some misgivings we got books designed for children, with pictures of birds and simple text. I worried she would not like them as she would see them as something for children, but she wasn't bothered and retained an ability to read simple text that I thought she had lost.
Others have found that their PWD enjoy sorting - e.g. a tray with screws, buttons etc of different shapes and colours. It doesn't matter if not much actual sorting takes place. Others enjoy folding - laundry, tea cloths etc. Mummy used to like polishing shoes, rather surprisingly, but this had to be supervised. I think I have heard other forum members mention colouring books and winding wool onto a spool. The activity doesnt have to have a practical application but sometimes repetitive movement (knitting etc if able) can be soothing.
Looking at old photo albums can also be therapeutic.
Hello and welcome from me too @The Reas.
You say that your Mum no longer likes TV. My wife is the same as she can't follow a film etc. However, my wife can sit and watch repeats of quiz shows(no plot) all day long so I wonder if that's worth a try.
Beyond that, I wonder if you may find any local support services like a memory café to be of some use when the current crisis permits. You can do a post code check to see what's available to you by following this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you
The full list of the very informative Factsheets can be found with this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list and you may find some ideas there.
If communicating becomes an issue, a few handy tips can be picked from the useful thread that can be reached with this link https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/compassionate-communication-with-the-memory-impaired.30801/
You say that your Mum no longer likes TV. My wife is the same as she can't follow a film etc. However, my wife can sit and watch repeats of quiz shows(no plot) all day long so I wonder if that's worth a try.
Beyond that, I wonder if you may find any local support services like a memory café to be of some use when the current crisis permits. You can do a post code check to see what's available to you by following this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you
The full list of the very informative Factsheets can be found with this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list and you may find some ideas there.
If communicating becomes an issue, a few handy tips can be picked from the useful thread that can be reached with this link https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/compassionate-communication-with-the-memory-impaired.30801/
Most people with dementia reach a stage called shadowing. It comes when their short-term memory decreases to a very short span.
You may tell her that you are just going in the kitchen to cook dinner, but from her point of view, after a couple of minutes she has forgotten; she is on her own and has no idea how long it has been like this. She doesnt know if its been 2 minutes, or 2 weeks; she doent know if there is anyone else around, she doesnt know if anyone is coming back or whether she has been abandoned; she is not sure about where she is, why she is there or what she is supposed to be doing and she is afraid. So she goes looking for you. This is happening in her mind, constantly, 24/7, every minute of her waking life she wants you within sight so that she is reassured and directed.
From your view point this is untenable. Once the lock down is over, it would be a good idea to get someone in to sit with her while you do other things. People like the Red Cross and Age UK will provide this service, though I think you may have to pay for it. You dont mention carers - if you dont have carers in I would reccommend them. OH has a carer in to help him wash/shower and dress etc in the mornings and it frees up my time and gives me an hour to get things done which I cant do at other times. You may also find that day care will provide her with company and give you a break.
You may tell her that you are just going in the kitchen to cook dinner, but from her point of view, after a couple of minutes she has forgotten; she is on her own and has no idea how long it has been like this. She doesnt know if its been 2 minutes, or 2 weeks; she doent know if there is anyone else around, she doesnt know if anyone is coming back or whether she has been abandoned; she is not sure about where she is, why she is there or what she is supposed to be doing and she is afraid. So she goes looking for you. This is happening in her mind, constantly, 24/7, every minute of her waking life she wants you within sight so that she is reassured and directed.
From your view point this is untenable. Once the lock down is over, it would be a good idea to get someone in to sit with her while you do other things. People like the Red Cross and Age UK will provide this service, though I think you may have to pay for it. You dont mention carers - if you dont have carers in I would reccommend them. OH has a carer in to help him wash/shower and dress etc in the mornings and it frees up my time and gives me an hour to get things done which I cant do at other times. You may also find that day care will provide her with company and give you a break.
My mother in law lost the capacity pretty quickly to use the TV and would just sit in front of it staring at the screen even when it was off. She had a home library service but lost the ability to follow a story line , even though she kept saying she had read all the books in one day. Clearly she hadn't. She had carers in three times a day , she was self funding and the agency she used also provided a sitting service. You might try a befriending service , mother in law had one from the royal voluntary service. There was a bit of a waiting list though.
My Mum has mixed dementia also. She can no longer follow tv which used to keep her occupied. I have tried various things to keep her occupied and the her favourite activities are colouring (children’s colouring books) and she loves doing jigsaw puzzles. You can buy ones that have extra large pieces or children’s puzzles.
She loves doing them and gets a real sense of achievement when she finishes them. Worth a try...
She loves doing them and gets a real sense of achievement when she finishes them. Worth a try...
