My mother (54) who is suffering from dementia has been on rapid decline. I am 30 and have been trying to accept, adjust and manage this situation and this feeling of loss. My life decisions now revolves around her. I feel directionless most of the time. I am only beginning to accept this situation and the fact that she is mentally barely 10% of what my mother used to be once. But right now what is really making me anxious is the unpredictability of this disease and the suffering she will have to go through and how it will shape my future.
I know that this disease progresses differently and each case is unique but if someone whose loved one is at a later stage (cannot eat, talk or move) could share what kind of changes (especially behaviour wise) happened and how long did each stage last? That would really help me cope with this situation better.
For my mother
-started with lack of interest in family and difficulty doing some activities, general decline in awareness among other things which we noticed for 2 years
-difficulty focussing, reading and writing
-followed by diagnosis
-denial
one year later
-we noticed she doesn't take shower properly, aggressively resists any help, started talking to herself
-anxiety kicked in
-two falls within one month...fears falling when walking down the stairs
-does not like taking shower at all
-would only respond to one language, she knew two.
-cannot read or write
-would not eat properly
now eight months on
-her comprehension is almost zero, but she can still talk (to herself) about random things which creates socially awkward situation with people who don't understand her disease.
-anxiety and confusion levels higher than before
-hates taking shower, does not clean herself after going to the toilet, hygiene is a big issue, mornings are terrible
-can still call her children by names but cannot tell the relation
-eats better but also has to be prompted
-cannot follow any instruction and becomes very irritated
I know that this disease progresses differently and each case is unique but if someone whose loved one is at a later stage (cannot eat, talk or move) could share what kind of changes (especially behaviour wise) happened and how long did each stage last? That would really help me cope with this situation better.
For my mother
-started with lack of interest in family and difficulty doing some activities, general decline in awareness among other things which we noticed for 2 years
-difficulty focussing, reading and writing
-followed by diagnosis
-denial
one year later
-we noticed she doesn't take shower properly, aggressively resists any help, started talking to herself
-anxiety kicked in
-two falls within one month...fears falling when walking down the stairs
-does not like taking shower at all
-would only respond to one language, she knew two.
-cannot read or write
-would not eat properly
now eight months on
-her comprehension is almost zero, but she can still talk (to herself) about random things which creates socially awkward situation with people who don't understand her disease.
-anxiety and confusion levels higher than before
-hates taking shower, does not clean herself after going to the toilet, hygiene is a big issue, mornings are terrible
-can still call her children by names but cannot tell the relation
-eats better but also has to be prompted
-cannot follow any instruction and becomes very irritated
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