1. Beannie

    Beannie Registered User

    Aug 17, 2015
    94
    East Midlands
    I have just got back from visiting my husband in his care home, with our 29 year old daughter. He was obviously having a bad day as his speech was very bad and he kept saying he was checking to see how much room he had left in his bag (no idea what that was about). He had muddled up his glasses and kept saying the optician had got the prescription wrong (he had his eyes tested recently and has just had new glasses) when in fact he had put his reading glasses in his tv case and vice versa!!

    He rang this morning to ask why the speech therapist hadn't turned up when in fact she isn't due until Tuesday. He then asked me if he could come to our house next Saturday so we get back together!!

    It is so sad I could just curl up in a ball and cry. I never imagined I would be in this position at 62 when we should have been planning our retirement. I see other people of my age enjoying life and just feel so isolated. Also, both his sisters have early onset AD his older sister is 69 and was diagnosed 4 years ago and his younger sister 55 was diagnosed this year.

    I am also worried about my daughter and I am encouraging her to visit TP and maybe talk to other young people who have someone in their family with AD.

    Thanks for taking the time to read this and thanks TP for giving me an outlet.
     
  2. patsy56

    patsy56 Registered User

    Jan 14, 2015
    840
    Fife Scotland
    Oh Beannie, huggs, I too am having a hellish afternoon with OH.

    His Parkinson''s the doc gave him antidepressants and he is now so quiet and sleepy and I just feel like s***.

    I am only 59 OH is 76 and I love him to bits, but yes looking on FB and seeing the fun other friends are having. I too thought it would be great to retire and have time together but thank you Government I now have to work until I'm 66.6666 (sign of the devil) and I will be going to an early grave too.

    Sorry to hijack your board but I just know how you must be feeling........
     
  3. Kjn

    Kjn Registered User

    Jul 27, 2013
    5,835
    Oh Beannie , you too Patsy. I'm not surprised you are down. I'm not in the same situation and have no advice but certainly I'd give you both a huge hug right now xxxx
     
  4. LYN T

    LYN T Registered User

    Aug 30, 2012
    6,967
    Brixham Devon
    Yes, a hug from me to anyone who feels this despondent. I was 56 when my OH died last December-Pete was 68. I feel quite angry when I hear couples bickering or being unkind to each other-if only they knew what could be in store for them.

    Take care everyone

    Love

    Lyn T XX
     
  5. CollegeGirl

    CollegeGirl Registered User

    Jan 19, 2011
    9,535
    North East England
    Massive hugs from me to all of you. I'm so sorry things are so tough and that your lives are not how you imagined they would be. This must be the hardest thing of all to face, I think.

    xxx
     
  6. kingybell

    kingybell Registered User

    Feb 3, 2015
    115
    We are not as young as your daughter but in our mid 30s. My mil is 57 and has dementia and we are coping ok. Every day is a learning curve and we have some fun times too.
    I think the best advice I could give her would be to do fun things with dad like a drive with his favourite music on the stereo or putting together a photo book or digital photo frame.
     
  7. Beannie

    Beannie Registered User

    Aug 17, 2015
    94
    East Midlands
    How are things?

    Hi Patsy 56,

    Thanks for your message the other day, How is your OH? I am going to my husband's care home tomorrow as he has a speech therapy session at 10am. I want to be there to see if there is anything we can do to help him as well.
     
  8. VonVee

    VonVee Registered User

    Dec 15, 2014
    70
    Poole Dorset
    Dear Beannie

    I'm not as young as your daughter, but I'm 44 and dealing with my mum, and it's hard, she has late moderate to early sever dementia, and it's horrible to watch, I spend every day with her, in-between school runs, and I'm used to it now, but at first it was shocking to me to find my mum in that state, because dad had done so well in hiding it for so long, and it came as a shock. My 13 year old visits rarely, I do try and encourage it, but at 13 she has her own mind, I can't make her.

    This is not easy whatever age you are.

    All the best to you and your daughter, take care of each other.

    Love Vonvee




     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.