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Welcome to Talking Point - introduce yourself here

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Cat27

Volunteer Moderator
Feb 27, 2015
11,319
Merseyside
Hi Everyone,

I am a carer for my mum Kathleen who has Vascular Dementia, she lives in London and me in Essex
I go to visit her three times a week, I moved her into extra care housing last August, however I have had to fight good care all the way.

I am sure many of you out there have this problem.
Welcome to TP :)
 

Honeydew

Registered User
Jul 18, 2016
2
Chicago
Hello I am new to this forum.

MIL was diagnosed about 1 and half years ago. Long story short my FIL passed away about 6 months ago and my MIL has gotten really bad very quickly. My poor husband has been running himself ragged and his siblings are really no help! (they are to busy and all live too far away!) I finally got him to agree to let me help. This all very strange too me because my sibling are very close and cared for my father till he passed away 3 years ago.
Hubby has 3 siblings the oldest sister lives 20 minutes away. We live 45 minutes away. Other brother lives an hour and half away. And youngest sister lives about 45 minutes away also. The biggest thing is that my husband works 3 shift so he gets home in the morning. After driving 70 miles home. Then he drives out to his Moms house.
I am sorry for this being so long lol! I guess I was just trying to fill you all in. Oh there is more but I wont bore you all!
 

Hilary79

Registered User
Jul 19, 2016
1
Cardiff
New member

Hi All
I am new to his forum . I have been working with people living with Dementia and is going to be involved in research work soon therefore being in it I can see the challenges and practical difficulties we face .
 

JulieMG

Registered User
Jul 19, 2016
3
Hi everyone,

My MiL is in the late stages of Alzheimer's and things have changed in the last couple of weeks. She's about to be reassessed in terms of her care package. She's terrified about being put into a care home. So sad.

Thanking you in advance for any guidance you can give us.

Julie
 

Shedrech

Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
9,054
Yorkshire
Hi Hilary79
Hi All
I am new to his forum . I have been working with people living with Dementia and is going to be involved in research work soon therefore being in it I can see the challenges and practical difficulties we face .
so many reasons to come to TP and everyone is welcome
there's lots of information available on the forum
nd it'll be interesting to read about the research
best wishes
 

Shedrech

Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
9,054
Yorkshire
Hi JulieMG
Hi everyone,

My MiL is in the late stages of Alzheimer's and things have changed in the last couple of weeks. She's about to be reassessed in terms of her care package. She's terrified about being put into a care home. So sad.

Thanking you in advance for any guidance you can give us.

Julie
a time of change for you and your MIL - so it's good that you've found TP to share your experiences and read how others deal with situations
lots of sympathetic members will read your posts and respond
so settle in, start a thread and get chatting
best wishes
 

JackiD

Registered User
Jun 4, 2016
3
Campsall
Hi JackiD
you need a place to go - you've found it :)
come along to chat, just read, post a photo of a butterfly, ask a question and definitely let off steam - we could probably power an engine between us all
and yes - lots folk who understand and offer support
so do start a thread of your own or join in an existing one

best wishes to you and to your mum and sisters
Thank you , mum is unwell at the moment . I set up meals on wheels for her and she rebelled against it. She became like a sulky child and now in the last week took too many pills , made herself ill and is now not eating at all ! Oh joy
 

Poet1

Registered User
Aug 10, 2015
22
Hello everyone,

My wife has Alzheimers - stage 3 and beginning to nudge into stage 4. We still get on together happily although difficulties are becoming progressively more annoying to me; I just put up with them without comment.

I am rather deaf and find the phone stressful and difficult. My wife is also my carer for prostate cancer (in remission) and severe depression now controlled with medication and Talking Therapy.

My wife knows of the diagnosis of MCI but her psychiatrist (and mine) told me she has Alzheimers. He does not think she should be told that she has Alzheimers. I think she fears it may be so. She knows that I think so but attributes that to Anxiety/Depression on my part.

She has refused medication as it did not agree with her. She also refused the group therapy she was offered. I feel in need of advice and training on how to do my best for my wife.


Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
 

Shedrech

Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
9,054
Yorkshire
Hello Poet1
sounds as though you and your wife have a fair bit on your plates to deal with
so I'm glad you've come across TP
there are plenty of others here to chat with about your experiences
and from the number of posts on your profile, looks as though you've settled right in and joined a few conversations already
best wishes to you both
 

MaryI

Registered User
Jul 27, 2016
3
New member

Hi. I just joined this forum today in the hope of seeking support and advice. My older sister has been diagnosed with Frontal Variant Alzheimers : she is just 54 years old so it's been a huge blow. She lives on the west coast of Canada and I'm in the UK. We're very close but right now I feel pretty useless. I've not been able to speak with anyone in a similar position to me but you must be out there somewhere? Thanks, Mary
 

Alley

Registered User
Dec 14, 2015
5
Newhall, Derbyshire
Behavourial Variant Frontotemporal Dementia (Pick's Disease)

Hi. I just joined this forum today in the hope of seeking support and advice. My older sister has been diagnosed with Frontal Variant Alzheimers : she is just 54 years old so it's been a huge blow. She lives on the west coast of Canada and I'm in the UK. We're very close but right now I feel pretty useless. I've not been able to speak with anyone in a similar position to me but you must be out there somewhere? Thanks, Mary
Hi Maryl.
My wife was diagnosed with FTP in September last year. She is always happy, even when i have lost my temper with her. Her memory is fine at the moment and she can do things around our home, unaided. She sometimes struggles with finding the correct words when talking and switches subjects a lot, so you are never sure if she is talking about what we are, or what we were talking about. She is very loving to me, kissing me loads during the day and hasn't got a bad bone in her body. FTP seems to affect people differently, so try and make the best of what you have and get as much help as you can. I have had loads of help. I wish you all the best.
Alley
 

Abbsy

Registered User
Jul 28, 2016
9
Staffordshire
Hello everyone

Hello,

I stumbled upon this forum yesterday after doing a Google search for 'silent aspiration'! I hadn't heard of TP until then, and I'm really glad I found it.

I am an only 'child' (just turned 50) caring for my 89 year old mum who has Alzheimer's and Vascular Dementia. I'm lucky in that she is still living nearby in her warden-managed flat, and we have a package of support from SS. That said, the emotional strain upon myself and my husband and children is still immense, and the going is pretty tough at the moment.

Already I have seen so many posts that echo the problems that my mum and I have experienced over the past couple of years, and for the first time in ages I feel that I am not alone in this awful situation. I have cried with both relief and sympathy, a mixed blessing knowing that I am not alone, but sadness knowing that others are going through this too.

I look forward to joining in with the forum,

Kind regards

Abbsy
 

chris53

Registered User
Nov 9, 2009
2,929
London
Hi Abbsy, good evening and a warm welcome here to Talking Point:) so sorry things are tough just now, it's so hard to switch off and be "yourself" if only for a day or even a couple of hours..much support and understanding here and even smiles at times, ask away on anything and everything whenever needed and whatever time of day or night.
Take care
Chris x
 

DK13

Registered User
Jul 24, 2016
1
Kent, England
In process of Diagnosis

Hi,
I've joined TP in the hope of some ideas to help my father (aged 71). We've finally managed to get him to see the doctor, and are now in the process of diagnosis. He's had the memory test, and today had a CT Scan. We've been noticing symtoms for several years now, but he's refused to accept anything's wrong, and woudn't see a doctor, saying that he'd rather 'top himself' than be diagnosed with dementia.

I think he's now at a fairly advanced stage - cannot hold a conversation, just repeats the same things over and over, cannot follow simple instructions, has problems walking distances and climbing steps/stairs, and spends hours just standing and sanding pieces of wood or whittling sticks (he was v advanced in his DIY skills just a few years ago). He struggled in the memory test - it was traumatic for my Mum and I, he barely managed to answer a single question.

I'm worried about how he will take his diagnosis, when he sees a consultant, and how we will managed to get him to accept help.

Looking forward to meeting people with similar challenges.
 

Shedrech

Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
9,054
Yorkshire
Hi MaryI
Hi. I just joined this forum today in the hope of seeking support and advice. My older sister has been diagnosed with Frontal Variant Alzheimers : she is just 54 years old so it's been a huge blow. She lives on the west coast of Canada and I'm in the UK. We're very close but right now I feel pretty useless. I've not been able to speak with anyone in a similar position to me but you must be out there somewhere? Thanks, Mary
and a warm welcome from me too
I know there are long distance carers on TP who will understand your situation
and I'm just wondering - if you add to your profile your location, just UK is fine or county/town maybe, and your sister's location eg Canada then members can see your position at a glance and Canadian members may well have info for you particular to the Canadian system - only if you are happy to add this info
best wishes to you both
 

Danni39

Registered User
Jul 30, 2016
1
I'm Danni

Hi all, I stumbled across here in the quest of trying to deal with my boyfriends dad having late stage alzheimers. I don't want to sound like a witch, but as we speak I am locked in my bedroom because I needed just a tiny bit of alone time. I can't take it. My boyfriends mom who is the primary caregiver, ups and leaves for 5 days at a clip for some bs origami convention, meanwhile, his older brother conveniently has to work, and so my boyfriend is left to the caregivers. This wouldn't be bad, however, it has now turned into me having to do the cleaning, the cooking, the reminding of using the restroom, the entertaining, I don't know this guy. I don't want to sound terrible but I was primary caregiver of my mother who died of lung cancer, I am not up to having to take care of someone else's parent when there are 2 completely capable relatives who choose not to. I suggested they get a nurse, the mother doesn't want a nurse because she is a hoarder and doesn't want anyone in her house. Both the mother and the father retired with state benefits, she can afford a full time nurse. I'm sorry for venting.like this as my first post, I'm at my wits end after having to clean human poop off of my toilet, and having to.hide out so I can't be followed in my own house. I'm literally at the point where I'm trying to volunteer to go to another country so I can get away from this mess. Help
 
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