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Welcome to Talking Point - introduce yourself here

Discussion in 'Welcome and how to use Dementia Talking Point' started by Mark_W, May 29, 2018.

  1. nae sporran

    nae sporran Volunteer Host

    Oct 29, 2014
    5,827
    Male
    Bristol
    Hullo @cuteweenumber and welcome to talking point. Sorry your mother in law has had this diagnosis and you are struggling to cometo terms with it all.
    I have pasted a couple of links which hopefully will point you to support and information on dementia, but of course everyone with dementia is different so reading the threads will give you a better idea.
    Your husband may or may not be right on taking his mum on holiday, my OH and I went away for a weekend only a few months after diagnosis with no problems, though it would be hard to do so now. It's all a judgement call on how bad she is, but never say never.

    https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/about-dementia/types-dementia/what-dementia
    https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you

    https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/compassionate-communication-with-the-memory-impaired.30801/

    Good luck.
     
  2. nitram

    nitram Registered User

    Apr 6, 2011
    18,934
    Male
    North Manchester
    #102 nitram, Jun 14, 2018
    Last edited: Jun 14, 2018
    It may be OK, on the other hand it may not, with dementia 'You pays your money and you takes your chance'.

    Change of location may have drastic effects, or it may not.

    In my wife's case with MCI ? (mild cognitive impairment) it lead to:-

    Translations

    Document 1 (the doctor at Agios Nikolaos) 14/09/09
    • The patient arrived at Agios Nikolaos Health centre thinking that she came to a school in order to assist the children.
    • Referred to optical hallucinations (that the house is burning, people are attacking her).
    • Aural hallucinations (hears voices from within her head).
    • Unable to create sentences with a logical sequence.
    • Lack of concentration.
    • Lack of spatial orientation (she thinks she is in Africa).
    Observed a drop in the corner of her mouth, which, according to her husband, was there previously.
    BP 120/65 mmHg: Pulse 73/min: SpO2 96%: Glu 101 mg/dL: Temp 36.3 °C
    Request for psychiatric evaluation and treatment

    This was at an accommodation that we had rented several times before, I was worried about her, the clinic was adjacent, she would not go there, then she decided it was a school and the priest was there telling the children how to sing.
    I jumped at this opportunity to go to the clinic.

    Result was a visit to Kalamata hospital the next day (wedding anniversary!) with CT scans etc.
    They wanted to admit her to a psychiatric ward, having ascertained there were no acute problems I signed for her to be discharged as I did not want the 'chemical cosh' approach.
    They were not happy, EHIC + passport means kerching from gov.uk.
    I can be very persuasive!

    Going through both Greek and UK airports with a totally confused wife is another story!
     
  3. lou62

    lou62 New member

    Jun 14, 2018
    6
    Hello, Louise here. My mother has Alzheimer's, but so far is managing to live at home with carers going in twice a day. I live many miles from mum, but have two brothers who live close by who see her frequently. Another brother lives miles away like me. I think things are beginning to change now and I have posted on the main forum page for some advice.
     
  4. Lindy50

    Lindy50 Registered User

    Dec 11, 2013
    5,302
    Cotswolds
    Hello Louise and welcome. I have replied to your post on the main forum.
    Lindy
     
  5. lou62

    lou62 New member

    Jun 14, 2018
    6
    Thank you.
     
  6. Tear631

    Tear631 New member

    Jun 15, 2018
    1
    Female
    Hi
    I am new to here and found the site accidently, glad to say, my mother is 84 and had vascular dementia and Alzheimer's she has just been diagnosed about 3 months ago, I work full time and look after my mother by myself, none of my family want to know or help. I'm finding it hard to see the mother I love ask me what coat to put on or show me how to use a kettle, Its like she is the child and I'm the mother. I am grateful there is people out there that can understand and help.
     
  7. Cat27

    Cat27 Volunteer Moderator

    Feb 27, 2015
    10,174
    Merseyside
    Welcome to TP @Tear631

    I struggled with the parent child reversal when I cared for my Dad.
    Keep posting as you'll get lots of support here.
     
  8. sglen66

    sglen66 New member

    Jun 16, 2018
    3
    Hi my name is Sandra and my mother who is 89 was recently diagnosed with vascular dementia. She has been prescribed Donepezil and took her first tablet last night but she had very bad abdominal pain which I know is one of the side effects. Is there anything I can give her to reduce the pain.
     
  9. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,403
    Kent
    Hello Sandra @sglen66 . Welcome to Talking Point.

    I think your first call should be your mother`s doctor for this kind of medical advice. These drugs don`t agree with everyone and if you know one of the side effects your mother experienced is on the list , her doctor will be the best person to advise.

    Now you have introduced yourself to Talking Point, please start your own Thread. This way , any replies , advice or support you get will all be in the same place.

    The best sub forum for you will be I care for a person with dementia

    https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/i-care-for-a-person-with-dementia.70/
     
  10. sglen66

    sglen66 New member

    Jun 16, 2018
    3
    Hello my name is Sandra and my mother was diagnosed with vascular dementia yesterday. She has been prescribed Donepezil but she has very bad abdominal pain which I know is one of the side effects. Is there something I can give her to reduce the pain
     
  11. karaokePete

    karaokePete Registered User

    Jul 23, 2017
    4,898
    N Ireland
    #111 karaokePete, Jun 16, 2018
    Last edited: Jun 16, 2018
    Hello @sglen66, welcome to TP, I hope you find the forum a friendly, informative and supportive place.

    It can take a couple of weeks to settle on Donepezil and my wife was warned about that and told to stick with it if she had problems when she was started on it. Abdominal upset is a common side effect. Maybe your GP has a telephone service that could deal with the issue for you.
     
  12. mumsgone

    mumsgone Registered User

    Dec 23, 2015
    921
    Hi tear631
    We are all here for you and can relate to what you are saying. Can remember having to tell my mum skirt up knickers down when she needed the toilet just like potty training, still she must have done it for me ! She is still and always will be the mother you love she is just in a different phase of her life. xx
     
  13. Cat27

    Cat27 Volunteer Moderator

    Feb 27, 2015
    10,174
    Merseyside
    Welcome to TP @sglen66
    I think you need to contact your Mum’s GP as none of us here are medical experts.
     
  14. Hazara8

    Hazara8 Registered User

    Apr 6, 2015
    354
    Aricept made my late mother very nauseous. But as has been stated above, one should consult the GP primarily in respect of side effects and attending to them.
     
  15. sglen66

    sglen66 New member

    Jun 16, 2018
    3
    Thanks everyone for the advice. I went to the pharmacy and the head pharmacist was very helpful. Her mum is going through the same thing so she gave me a couple of things to help. It seems to be working so far. Once again thanks for your help.
     
  16. nellbelles

    nellbelles Volunteer Host

    Nov 6, 2008
    8,377
    leicester
    Welcome to TP, @sglen66 I’m glad you are finding it a helpful site, please keep posting we are a friendly bunch.
     
  17. Chickpea73

    Chickpea73 New member

    Jun 16, 2018
    1
    Hi, I've joined because I have two elderly neighbors I worry about. One has dementia and has visits from carers and family so it's just a case of keeping an eye out, like when she locks herself out. The other is more challenging as he's refusing to see a doctor so has no diagnosis but has confusion, paranoia and forgets his words to the extent that conversation is almost impossible sometimes. His younger wife won't take steps to get him help and he's left alone all day. Today I had to resort to phoning 999 to stop him climbing over a 6ft fence to prune ivy. He fell twice and was aggressive. Hopefully now he'll have contact with the crisis team. His wife has her head in the sand. He is convinced she is trying to kill him. I hated having to stop him doing something he's always managed before and making him feel old but he's not able to assess risk anymore
     
  18. karaokePete

    karaokePete Registered User

    Jul 23, 2017
    4,898
    N Ireland
    Hello and welcome to TP. This man is lucky to have a good neighbour as he seems to be suffering the fear that comes with the territory when the confusion of dementia strikes. It's important to get a diagnosis as other treatable things like infections, depression etc., can cause dementia like symptoms

    My gut reaction is to suggest it might be best to contact Social Services and report that this man may be a vulnerable person as they have a legal duty of care. Indeed, the police may already have made a report to SS. However, it may be best to check with the help line experts first to see what is the best thing to do so here are the details for you and I hope this helps:-

    National Dementia Helpline
    0300 222 11 22
    Our helpline advisers are here for you.
    Helpline opening hours:
    Monday to Wednesday 9am – 8pm
    Thursday and Friday 9am – 5pm
    Saturday and Sunday 10am – 4pm

    Good luck with this.
     
  19. Blackpoolcath60

    Blackpoolcath60 New member

    Jun 17, 2018
    5
    Hi I,m new to the forum and i have joined, as my mum has been diagnosed with dementia (vascular).As I work within the health profession ,it has been presumed that I already possess the knowledge on this condition. As her carer I feel so frightened ,lost and alone and all my nursing knowledge has just gone out of the window .
     
  20. nae sporran

    nae sporran Volunteer Host

    Oct 29, 2014
    5,827
    Male
    Bristol
    Hullo and welcome to TP, @Blackpoolcath60. I know that feeling well and you will find support and advice here, so you won't need to feel alone or isolated. If you want to talk about your fears or just find a friendly "ear" then feel free to post on https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/i-care-for-a-person-with-dementia.70/. You will also find support services like memory cafes closer to home on
    http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/info/2...1360.1519998619-604353012.1519998619#!/search.
    I hope any of that is helpful to you. Good luck and best wishes.
     
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