Hi there. My husband is in late stage dementia. I am told it is complicated with a brain injury he sustained several years earlier from a car accident. He is 70 years of age. He has all the "normal" symptoms of late stage. On good days he can figure out how to open his mouth to eat, on bad days he licks the pudding off his lips . I am told that he is in a dementia loop, where he will have episodes of near dying and then recover somewhat and then repeat. We have had this happen 4 times since June. I Know that I lost my husband some time ago, long before he ever left the house to move into a nursing home. I think I miss his ability to talk to me the most. We had wonderful conversations. It's been 15 months since he moved in, I live very close to the home and I go often. But now a days it is more difficult to make a connection with him. I will shave him, when he doesn't really need to be shaved , just to touch him. I will put cream on his hands and feet. I look for signs that he is still in there behind those roaming eyes that no longer see. Like the way he use to roll his eyes, smile, or laugh. I believe I am grieving and experiencing the 7 stages of grief. Someone died in the home last week. I found myself thinking they were able to walk , go the bathroom, talk, feed themselves and "they" get to die, while my husband has to continue to live. I don't usually have angry thoughts...depressed thoughts yes, oh poor me thoughts.. smile.. yes, I have those quite often. But not angry ones.. I hate the road I am on. I want a short cut. I want to stop thinking what ifs, this never happened what would we be doing now. I never thought I would pray that God would take my sweet man away from me..and release his spirit..but now a days I do. I think when will I start feeling better, when is this hellish life I am living going to feel better.