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karaokePete

Registered User
Jul 23, 2017
6,534
0
N Ireland
Hello @Orca no1, you are welcome here and I hope you find the forum to be a friendly and supportive place.

Do take a good look around the site as it is a goldmine for information. When I first joined I read old threads for information but then found the AS Publications list and the page where a post code search can be done to check for support services in ones own area. If you are interested in these, clicking the following links will take you there

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you

You will see that there are Factsheets that will help with things like getting care needs assessments, deciding the level of care required and sorting out useful things like Wills, Power of Attorney etc.

Now that you have found us I hope you will keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.
 

Supportadaughter

New member
Jan 11, 2019
1
0
Hi. I’m very worried and need advice. My mum receives state pension and higher attendance allowance. And needs to go into care dementia nursing care home? How will this effect her finances. Very little savings and only the above income?? Will she have any income or will the authorities take her pension etc from her to pay?
 

Shedrech

Registered User
Dec 15, 2012
12,649
0
UK
hello @Supportadaughter
a warm welcome to TP
these pages of the main AS site may clear things up for you
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/legal-financial/who-pays-care

in brief, if your mum has assets below £14250, ie savings and a property, and is on a low income, the Local Authority will contribute to paying her care fees
her state pension will be used, except a living expenses allowance of about £25 a week, and the AA will cease
the LA will want her to move into a home at the rate they set aside for fees and must suggest at least one home, which may mean that it's not one you might choose yourself - the family could agree to pay a top-up to the LA rate for your mum to be in a home of your choice, but you do not have have to pay a top-up, and be aware that the top-up will increase each year
 

Merinda

New member
Jan 16, 2019
3
0
Hello. I care for my 80 year old husband who has Alzheimer’s. It became obvious to me when he was about 70 but family and friends were in denial. Eventually it became clear to them and a diagnosis about 5 years ago. We moved a few months ago to more suitable accommodation near our daughters. We have been together for 60 years and married for nearly 58. Our family are very supportive and providing help when they can. He has begun to be agitated and awkward saying no all the time. Problems eating. Wanting to go out and walk all the time and difficulty sleeping. Our life had been relatively normal until now. I just really don’t know where to start although I did visit the AS today.
 

karaokePete

Registered User
Jul 23, 2017
6,534
0
N Ireland
Hello @Merinda, you are welcome here and I hope you find the forum to be a friendly and supportive place.

Do take a good look around the site as it is a goldmine for information. When I first joined I read old threads for information but then found the AS Publications list and the page where a post code search can be done to check for support services in ones own area. If you are interested in these, clicking the following links will take you there

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you

You will see that there are Factsheets that will help with things like getting care needs assessments, deciding the level of care required and sorting out useful things like Wills, Power of Attorney etc.

The problems you are encountering are common and when your husband says no it may just be a breakdown of the ability to communicate rather than a literal 'no'. This may also explain the agitation as it may be a symptom of his exasperation. You will see that one of the factsheets in the publication list covers communication. However, don't delay talking to your GP about new symptoms as things like infections can cause new symptoms and they can be cured and produce a return to normal. Even if it is a worsening of the dementia the GP may be able to assist.

Now that you have found us I hope you will keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.
 

Emergency99

New member
Jan 19, 2019
1
0
Hi ..my mum was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and I'm struggling losing her. I feel like I missed something,I've gone from mild degenerative changes(which we didnt get inforned about)to severe frontal lobe changes in two years..my mum is scared everyday. And I'm trying not to break but losing her..losing her is breaking my heart. Please help me start to know how to do this x
 

Jip

New member
Jan 20, 2019
1
0
Hi....
Just registered and wanted to say hello...my mum has dementia among other long suffered problems..myself and my late father have cared for her for... Well all of my life from 6/7years.. First with depression and sever anxiaty... Then at 50 poor mum had a life changing stroke..
After dad became ill with heart failure 4 years ago we moved in all together but I couldn't care for both so mum went into a local care home..mainly for the night time care... We still brought her home and took dad everyday to be together... Then 6 months later dad had a fatal heart attack and just have mum now..
I don't know what stage mum is... She's very up and down... Iv read lots of your posts and see we all share similar stories.. Hardships and life's trials... This is an awful disease ... Sorry if iv gone on... Didn't quite know what to say..
 

nae sporran

Registered User
Oct 29, 2014
9,213
0
Bristol
Hullo and welcome to TP @Jip. I'm glad you have found some comfort already from reading other posts, and no you have not gone on too long. Feel free to post more when you are ready to share or need advice..
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
74,005
0
72
Dundee
Hi @Jip and welcome to the forum.

I'm sorry to read about your situation but I'm glad you've found the forum. As @nae sporran said you haven't gone on too long! This is the place to share your concerns and feelings and to ask questions.

Now that you've introduced yourself you might want to start a thread of your own. If you do go to the
I Care For A Person With Dementia area of the forum -

https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/i-care-for-a-person-with-dementia.70/

At the top, you'll see a button called 'Post New Thread' - click or tap on this. Add a discussion title and below, add your message.

I'm sure you'll find the forum both helpful and supportive.
 

karaokePete

Registered User
Jul 23, 2017
6,534
0
N Ireland
Hello @Emergency99, welcome to the forum, which I hope you will find to be a friendly, informative and supportive place.

What you are feeling is very common and is called anticipatory grief. It is mentioned on Pg4 of the Society Factsheet that can be read by clicking the second line of the following link
Grief, loss and bereavement (507)
PDF printable version

You have come to the right place for support so feel free to vent feelings or ask questions as the membership have vast collective knowledge and experience.

If you click the following links you will find the informative Publications List and a page where you can do a post code search for support services in your area
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets
 

jenniferpa

Registered User
Jun 27, 2006
39,442
0
@Doodles87 - you can (it's called conversations on this forum - look for the envelope in the top right corner) provided you have 10 posts which you do. On the whole it really is better to post on the forum as you get a wider variety of views and options.
 
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