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hello @Mahakey
a warm welcome to TP
sorry to hear that you are struggling; little of living with dementia in your life comes easy does it
you've certainly found the best place to share your experiences with folk who understand- there's lots of support and helpful suggestions in the threads - so do have a mooch around and then start your own thread when you are ready - no question or topic is off limits, someone will come along with an idea to help you
a warm welcome to TP
sorry to hear that you are struggling; little of living with dementia in your life comes easy does it
you've certainly found the best place to share your experiences with folk who understand- there's lots of support and helpful suggestions in the threads - so do have a mooch around and then start your own thread when you are ready - no question or topic is off limits, someone will come along with an idea to help you
libraryspectre, here. My mother has vascular dementia, and my dad and I take care of her. She was diagnosed a couple years ago, but I'm positive it started before then, of course. I've been lurking the forum for a short while, but today I decided that I should join you all. The familiarity and differences of our stories gives me more insight into this painful disease, and it's always good to connect with others, right? I'll do my best to post regularly.
Welcome to Talking Point @libraryspectre. I hope you will be glad you decided to join us.
Please start your own Thread now you have introduced yourself. This way all your replies will be on one Thread.
https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/i-care-for-a-person-with-dementia.70/
Please start your own Thread now you have introduced yourself. This way all your replies will be on one Thread.
https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/forums/i-care-for-a-person-with-dementia.70/
Hello @libraryspectre, welcome to TP from me too. I hope you find the forum to be a friendly and supportive place.
When I first found the forum I also read old threads for information but then found the AS Publications list and the page where a post code search can be done to check for support services in ones own area. If you haven't found these yet and are interested in taking a look, clicking the following links will take you there
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you
You will see that there are Factsheets that will help with things like getting care needs assessments, deciding the level of care required and sorting out useful things like Wills, Power of Attorney etc., as well as describing all aspects of dementia.
Now that you have joined us I hope you do keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.
When I first found the forum I also read old threads for information but then found the AS Publications list and the page where a post code search can be done to check for support services in ones own area. If you haven't found these yet and are interested in taking a look, clicking the following links will take you there
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you
You will see that there are Factsheets that will help with things like getting care needs assessments, deciding the level of care required and sorting out useful things like Wills, Power of Attorney etc., as well as describing all aspects of dementia.
Now that you have joined us I hope you do keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.
Hello, I've signed up today because I am the main carer for my mum, who is 85. I'm looking for advice on making sure I look after her well and (if it's possible) how to plan for the future. At present, mum lives alone, but I spend a lot of time with her, do all her shopping, cooking, housework and laundry, as well as helping her wash and dress and putting her to bed at night. After a short illness which left mum more frail and a couple of falls, we've upped the amount of time we spend with her and also bought in some additional care, so that she's not gone fro more than a maximum of 3 hours. She is a widow and although we've made it clear she's welcome to come and live with us, she won't take us up on the offer. She did try a home for some respite care, but didn't really like it.
I'm finding it hard to come to terms with an uncertain future (for her and for me!) I dropped to a 4 day work week last year to spend more time with her, but now she's less mobile and has basically lost confidence moving around by herself, I've had to take Special Leave and now I'm working 2 days/ week from her house; doing a full day looking after her as well as getting her up, washed and dressed the rest of the week, as well as putting her to bed, with my brother helping out with some of the meals.
Needless to say, I need to make a decision about work sooner rather than later, but at 47, I just don't know which way to jump! I feel I'm letting my work down by not honestly giving it 100% anymore - mainly though being tired! I've been offered a year's unpaid leave, but apart from the fact an income is good (!) because my husband and I are not high-earners, I honestly have no idea what the future holds for mum.
I'm finding it hard to come to terms with an uncertain future (for her and for me!) I dropped to a 4 day work week last year to spend more time with her, but now she's less mobile and has basically lost confidence moving around by herself, I've had to take Special Leave and now I'm working 2 days/ week from her house; doing a full day looking after her as well as getting her up, washed and dressed the rest of the week, as well as putting her to bed, with my brother helping out with some of the meals.
Needless to say, I need to make a decision about work sooner rather than later, but at 47, I just don't know which way to jump! I feel I'm letting my work down by not honestly giving it 100% anymore - mainly though being tired! I've been offered a year's unpaid leave, but apart from the fact an income is good (!) because my husband and I are not high-earners, I honestly have no idea what the future holds for mum.
Hi I care for my husband who has vascular dementia with lewy bodies .for the past two an half years. I have secondary breast cancer an been on chemotherapy for about the same time.its been a hard struggle.at the beginning there was no help for the first year it was phone calls form filling in the end went to see a citizen advice lady she help me get to the right services an help sort out benefits which I knew nothing about we have worked all our lives .it's so stressful I nearly gave up twice. In the past five years I've lost my mum an dad an mother in law. Now I'm losing my hubby bit by bit. An it's funny how family an freinds disappear when you tell them your I'll?
hello @Maidmarion
a warm welcome to TP
what a lot you have been and are going through - I am amazed you have coped at all; you are incredible
I'm glad CAB were able to help you
and that you've found TP as there's so much sympathy, support and useful info here
whenever you're ready do start your own thread and folk will pop in to chat and help
a warm welcome to TP
what a lot you have been and are going through - I am amazed you have coped at all; you are incredible
I'm glad CAB were able to help you
and that you've found TP as there's so much sympathy, support and useful info here
whenever you're ready do start your own thread and folk will pop in to chat and help
Hi
My mum has just been diagnosed with FTD and Parkinson's. She is 68 and the disease seems to be progressing quickly. She has trouble walking and needs support. Has some trouble with incontenance. She is also experiencing very bad mood swings and seems to get very irritable/agressive in the early evening.Does anyone know the stages of this cruel disease and have any idea what stage she may be at.
Thanks
My mum has just been diagnosed with FTD and Parkinson's. She is 68 and the disease seems to be progressing quickly. She has trouble walking and needs support. Has some trouble with incontenance. She is also experiencing very bad mood swings and seems to get very irritable/agressive in the early evening.Does anyone know the stages of this cruel disease and have any idea what stage she may be at.
Thanks
Hello @Almm, you are welcome here and I hope you find the forum to be a friendly and supportive place.
Do take a good look around the site as it is a goldmine for information. When I first joined I read old threads for information but then found the AS Publications list and the page where a post code search can be done to check for support services in ones own area. If you are interested in these, clicking the following links will take you there
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you
You will see that there are Factsheets that will help with things like getting care needs assessments, deciding the level of care required and sorting out useful things like Wills, Power of Attorney etc., as well as the stages of dementia. The stages are very vague and fluid so you will find a lot of varying detail on the internet.
Now that you have found us I hope you will keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.
Do take a good look around the site as it is a goldmine for information. When I first joined I read old threads for information but then found the AS Publications list and the page where a post code search can be done to check for support services in ones own area. If you are interested in these, clicking the following links will take you there
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you
You will see that there are Factsheets that will help with things like getting care needs assessments, deciding the level of care required and sorting out useful things like Wills, Power of Attorney etc., as well as the stages of dementia. The stages are very vague and fluid so you will find a lot of varying detail on the internet.
Now that you have found us I hope you will keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.
Hello again @Almm, with regard to the stages, I know a lot of members(including myself) have found the detail on this site useful
https://www.alzinfo.org/understand-alzheimers/clinical-stages-of-alzheimers/
https://www.alzinfo.org/understand-alzheimers/clinical-stages-of-alzheimers/
Hullo and welcome to TP, Almm. Sorry your mum is getting worse, with two medical conditions to deal with. There are always others around with more experience than I have, but these factsheets may help.
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/about...rogresses/progression-frontotemporal-dementia
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/about-dementia/types-dementia/parkinsons-disease
I would also recommend asking your mum's GP for a referral to the bladder and bowel service. They should help with pads and pull ups for her incontinence.
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/about...rogresses/progression-frontotemporal-dementia
https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/about-dementia/types-dementia/parkinsons-disease
I would also recommend asking your mum's GP for a referral to the bladder and bowel service. They should help with pads and pull ups for her incontinence.
Hello @Cazz1977, welcome to the forum. You have come to the right place for information and support.
Whilst you can learn lots from threads on the forums, there is a publications list that covers all issues related to dementia and you can find that with this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list the list is useful for many things like understanding the issues and sorting out things like Power of Attorney, care needs assessments etc.
You can also do a post code check for support services in your area by following this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you
Now that you have found us I hope you will keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.
Whilst you can learn lots from threads on the forums, there is a publications list that covers all issues related to dementia and you can find that with this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list the list is useful for many things like understanding the issues and sorting out things like Power of Attorney, care needs assessments etc.
You can also do a post code check for support services in your area by following this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you
Now that you have found us I hope you will keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.
Hello!
I'm in my 30's living in Hampshire and caring full time for both my father who has mobility issues and my mother who has Alzheimers. What prompted me to sign up was my mother's recent deterioration, which has gotten to a point where im a bit out of my depth, so i am looking to educate myself as much as possible to make her comfortable. My mother has very vivid hallucinations, mostly at night and I would like to know if there is anything I can do to help ground her into reality or help her feel safe. She also wanders which means I have to be vigilant 24 hours a day. Obviously this is exhausting and if someone could point me in the right direction of tips or support i would greatly appreciate it. My mother is currently on memantine and risperidone. Putting either of them in a care facility is impossible for me financially and I don't think I could do it if it was.
Warm Regards
xcheqr
I'm in my 30's living in Hampshire and caring full time for both my father who has mobility issues and my mother who has Alzheimers. What prompted me to sign up was my mother's recent deterioration, which has gotten to a point where im a bit out of my depth, so i am looking to educate myself as much as possible to make her comfortable. My mother has very vivid hallucinations, mostly at night and I would like to know if there is anything I can do to help ground her into reality or help her feel safe. She also wanders which means I have to be vigilant 24 hours a day. Obviously this is exhausting and if someone could point me in the right direction of tips or support i would greatly appreciate it. My mother is currently on memantine and risperidone. Putting either of them in a care facility is impossible for me financially and I don't think I could do it if it was.
Warm Regards
xcheqr
a warm welcome to TP @xcheqr
you'll find lots of useful info here and much support on offer from members, so do have a good mooch around
I see you have already started a thread of your own, so won't give a detailed response here - just to say that care fees are paid from the person's own finances so not from your income/savings, and should your mum move into a care home your parents' property is disregarded in the financial assessment as long as her husband continues to live there
you'll find lots of useful info here and much support on offer from members, so do have a good mooch around
I see you have already started a thread of your own, so won't give a detailed response here - just to say that care fees are paid from the person's own finances so not from your income/savings, and should your mum move into a care home your parents' property is disregarded in the financial assessment as long as her husband continues to live there
Welcome to TP, Peterson. I assume you had to do something in a hurry, happens all the time here, and hope you will come back and post queries or just to let off steam whenever you have time.
This is my first post on here.
I dont like to think of myself as a carer but my mother was recently diagnosed with Vascular Dementia and my mother in law has 'memory problems'.
reading other posts alongside my own experience the best advice you can be given is to keep a sense of humour.
I have sadly become very cynical about the health professionals I have met when supporting my family members, they may be kind and considerate but they can not provide much practical help.
Thank you for allowing me the space to let of a little steam and feel that I am not alone
I dont like to think of myself as a carer but my mother was recently diagnosed with Vascular Dementia and my mother in law has 'memory problems'.
reading other posts alongside my own experience the best advice you can be given is to keep a sense of humour.
I have sadly become very cynical about the health professionals I have met when supporting my family members, they may be kind and considerate but they can not provide much practical help.
Thank you for allowing me the space to let of a little steam and feel that I am not alone
Welcome to the forum @oldjimbo54, I hope you find this to be a friendly and supportive place.
The membership has vast collective experience so feel free to ask questions or just join in threads.
I’m sure you will read some of the threads but you may also find the Publications list to be of interest and you can find that by clicking this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list
If you want to search for support in your area you can do a post code search by clicking this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you
The membership has vast collective experience so feel free to ask questions or just join in threads.
I’m sure you will read some of the threads but you may also find the Publications list to be of interest and you can find that by clicking this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list
If you want to search for support in your area you can do a post code search by clicking this link https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you
I've just opened Decembers welcome thread here:
https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/welcome-to-talking-point-find-out-more-and-say-hello.113250/
Thanks
https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/welcome-to-talking-point-find-out-more-and-say-hello.113250/
Thanks
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