Mum has been in a CH for 18 months now due to dementia. At Christmas I had her home for the day-we had 12 to lunch. Beforehand I was in two minds whether I should have her home or not-guilt took over how could I leave her there on Christmas Day!! Plus other people (who don't understand) sent me on a horrendous guilt trip. So she came home and for the first hour or so all was good-then it all fell apart confusion took over and she became extremely confused my two kids were amazing with her but no-one could pacify her-at 5 my son and I took her back to the CH. A member of staff said have you had a good day-all I have done is watch TV all day! was her response she had no recollection that she had been to my house! Anyhow I need advice-my daughter gets married in July I feel it will be too much for Mum particularly after seeing her Christmas Day. I know a career could come with her -is it acceptable to do just the church? How do you tell her she isn't coming to the reception-I know she probably won't remember but you cannot assume that-this is all so cruel but how do you know what you are doing is right? Is there a right and wrong? Also can anyone suggest any anti-guilt tablets-just imagine if there was such a thing! If only! X