we now know what it is

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
Hi Panda

You really do have your work cut out, don`t you. It sounds to me as if you`re meeting yourself coming backwards.

Just try to calm yourself and take stock. You are doing your very best, no-one could expect you to do more.

It`s a good idea to try to find a home in an area that your mother`s not too familiar with.

As far as your aunt is concerned, if she`s so interested, let her find a suitable home for your mum and let her ask you to inspect it.

You do what you`re doing best, looking after the best interests of your mum. But don`t forget to look after yourself too.

Take care


Registered User
Apr 16, 2006
The home I went to see yesterday was really nice and in a very pretty place and they have room for Mum. I came home feeling like I was begining to get somewhere, then Mum rang from the hospital to say please get me home and don't leave me here to rot. I then felt awful,she knows how to get to me and although practicaly I know she will be better off in the home it feels so awful that she will never be in her own home that she loves. Aunty came to visit me last night and I felt so bad I was able to say what I felt to her and she had the good sense to back off. Now I am faced with trying to get my head around people offering package of care options doe's anyone have expierience of these are they any good or bad. I am not sure I can take in much more information my head is exploding with it all:eek:


Registered User
Jun 27, 2006
Panda, can you be a bit more descriptive about "package of care options"? Do you mean in home or in a residential setting?


Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
SW Scotland
Panda, it sounds as if the SW is still trying to persuade you to have your mum hope.

The care package is what support SS can give, but the responsibility would remain with you. I don't think you can cope with it again, can you?

I think you have to remain firm and say that you can't cope. Hard, but what's the alternative?

Your own health is important. Tell them you're on the verge of a breakdown.

I'm glad you've found a nice home, it would be a shame to lose the place.