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Washing, sleeping and dressing

Prospector

Registered User
Sep 30, 2014
61
Trowbridge, Wiltshire
I have started having problems getting my wife to have a bath or shower, change her clothes and go to bed. Up until last week it was rarely a problem. Now she stays in the same clothes day and night for days on end. She is very antagonistic (and relatively aggressive) about changing clothes and washing, and each night she paces between bed and bathroom many times before settling. She had a blood sample taken for our GP yesterday but we won't get the results until next week.
Please does anyone have any practical tips for handling this sort of behaviour? I am still working, so I need sleep and cannot be with her all through the day.


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jeany123

Registered User
Mar 24, 2012
19,036
70
Durham
Hello Prospector has she had a urine test done as this seems out of character, it could be a UTI she does't need to have any other symptoms, but my husband is always worse when he has a urine infection and sometimes he has no symptoms at all, just he starts being awkward and stressed,

Best wishes Jeany x
 

Prospector

Registered User
Sep 30, 2014
61
Trowbridge, Wiltshire
Thank you Jeany for giving me some hope. Getting a urine sample into a tube would be difficult at the best of times but impossible with my wife's current state of mind. However according to our GP the blood sample (which was easy to do) will have some indicators if my wife has an infection.
I forgot to mention in my initial post that my wife also has big delusions and mood swings, has been very detached, in her own world, and has had more difficulty with steps than typically.
Luckily I am on holiday (at home) this week and next, so I hope we can get sorted out before I have to go back to work.


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jeany123

Registered User
Mar 24, 2012
19,036
70
Durham
My husband is unsteady, keeps sliding to the floor, protests at the carers helping, is abusive and delusional, once he is on antibiotics and they start to work he is like a different man, you wouldn't believe a simple urine infection could cause such havoc, I hope that this works for you,

I should have said he is also the same when constipated,

Best wishes Jeany x
 
Last edited:

Prospector

Registered User
Sep 30, 2014
61
Trowbridge, Wiltshire
I also forgot to mention that we had one day this week when everything was lovely, she got herself ready for a bath with no persuasion and little assistance, got into her pyjamas and then into bed and gave me a cuddle. I had my wife back again until after getting up next morning. Would love to have a few more days like this!


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jeany123

Registered User
Mar 24, 2012
19,036
70
Durham
I also forgot to mention that we had one day this week when everything was lovely, she got herself ready for a bath with no persuasion and little assistance, got into her pyjamas and then into bed and gave me a cuddle. I had my wife back again until after getting up next morning. Would love to have a few more days like this!


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Aw I know what you mean Prospector, treasure those moments,
 

LYN T

Registered User
Aug 30, 2012
6,960
Brixham Devon
Re getting a urine sample:eek: place an old, clean bowl into the toilet pan-easier to collect the urine-don't forget to wear washing up/medical gloves:eek:

Does your wife have any contact with a CPN/SW/ Mental health consultant? If so contact them. Stress the urgency. Meds can control some of the symptoms you describe. As a Carer you are entitled (by Law) to time off if you feel the need.

Please let us know how you get on if you can

Take care

Lyn T

Edit-cross posted with mrs mcgonnagal re the urine sample
 

Prospector

Registered User
Sep 30, 2014
61
Trowbridge, Wiltshire
I tried the old bowl in toilet pan idea over a year ago when my wife was being tested in the lead up to her diagnosis. It was highly stressful for her then - just would not work now with her current antagonism, believe me!
I'm sure if our GP has any suspicion of a UTI from any indicators then he will prescribe antibiotic.
Thanks for the tip anyway. Also, time off work would not be a major problem, but I don't feel good about letting others down.


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Prospector

Registered User
Sep 30, 2014
61
Trowbridge, Wiltshire
Picking up an old thread... I'm sure my wife has another UTI. I placed a small plastic bowl in the toilet pan as suggested, but without telling my wife. I think she is so badly affected by the UTI that she can't really see it. By day 2 (last night) I got a good specimen and am just waiting to take it in to the surgery. Just had to wait for a sample without solids or without getting flushed. Thanks for the advice and encouragement. Being a dementia carer teaches patience, persistence and perseverance.


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