I am a full time carer for my wife. She walks almost continually and usually, quietly, counts the steps she has taken as she walks along. By late afternoon/very early evening she is exhausted and goes to bed very early, doesn't sleep too well and wakes up early. I don't sleep too well alongside her and although I don't go to bed early I wake early with her. We live in an average size house with a small garden and are very rarely apart. Consequently no matter where I am or whatever I'm doing she walks past me extremely frequently. For the most part I take it in my stride (no pun intended!), but sometimes, especially when I am overly tired, I react badly (not physically!). Any comments or observations would be appreciated
Walking continually
- Thread starter Old4qs
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Welcome @Old4qs to this forum. I hope you will get plenty of advice.
I haven't had this issue myself as my OH could not walk much, and when he did he would fall- frequently.
Just thinking maybe you could try going to bed earlier so that you wouldn't be so tired yourself- just a suggestion.
Have you tried putting key words in the search box above- it would take you to solutions that would be more help than me!
I haven't had this issue myself as my OH could not walk much, and when he did he would fall- frequently.
Just thinking maybe you could try going to bed earlier so that you wouldn't be so tired yourself- just a suggestion.
Have you tried putting key words in the search box above- it would take you to solutions that would be more help than me!
Hello @Old4qs
I have read about people with dementia shadowing their carers. It`s thought to be a form of insecurity. If they are alone in a room they might think they are alone in the house.
What happens when you are sitting and relaxing? Does your wife sit with you or does she continue to walk? Are there any DVD`s of old television programmes or her favourite artists she would be happy to sit and watch? I used to settle my husband with DVDs of Dad`s Army, Only fools and horses or Andrea Bocelli.
My husband used to come looking for me if I was in a different room and I often stepped back only to step on his toes because I hadn`t realised he was behind me. The continual walking and counting I can imagine becoming really irritating.
Would listening to music using ear pods help?
I have read about people with dementia shadowing their carers. It`s thought to be a form of insecurity. If they are alone in a room they might think they are alone in the house.
What happens when you are sitting and relaxing? Does your wife sit with you or does she continue to walk? Are there any DVD`s of old television programmes or her favourite artists she would be happy to sit and watch? I used to settle my husband with DVDs of Dad`s Army, Only fools and horses or Andrea Bocelli.
My husband used to come looking for me if I was in a different room and I often stepped back only to step on his toes because I hadn`t realised he was behind me. The continual walking and counting I can imagine becoming really irritating.
Would listening to music using ear pods help?
Its an awful situation,my husband plods around the bungalow all night ,i do usually get up and put him back to bed ,but last night I woke with him ,hourly,but just let him carry on,still ready and up to go out from 6am for a walk..the doctor has prescribed anti psychotic and sleeping tablets ,but they have not had any effect,I feel exhausted ,but still have to work.
He is not tired at all ,and does shadow me .
Feel I'm living a nightmare.
He is not tired at all ,and does shadow me .
Feel I'm living a nightmare.
I really feel for you as my husband wanders around the house all the time, shadows me continually, stands right next to me when I'm cooking and hates being on his own so I can't even go into the garden for a bit of peace. But, he usually sleeps most of the night now, which he didn't do 6 months ago.
It is the hardest thing to do, look after someone when you are tired and worn out. Sometimes I get really irritable and don't behave how I think I should, with patience and compassion, and then I feel guilty and can't sleep. It's a viscous circle.
My advice would be to get help to give you some time to yourself.. Have you had a carers assessment from social services? When I did I was given some carers hours free of charge (not means tested) and eventually they arranged for my OH to go to a day centre once a week (means tested which I pay for).
It won't alter your wife's behaviour but you need rest and respite yourself in order to continue looking after her.
I am also told that these behaviours don't always last so the thought that they might eventually change keeps me going.
Sorry if this isn't any help but I found knowing there are people who are experiencing the same thing on this website and who understands makes me feel less alone. I hope you find some way of making life easier for YOU.
It is the hardest thing to do, look after someone when you are tired and worn out. Sometimes I get really irritable and don't behave how I think I should, with patience and compassion, and then I feel guilty and can't sleep. It's a viscous circle.
My advice would be to get help to give you some time to yourself.. Have you had a carers assessment from social services? When I did I was given some carers hours free of charge (not means tested) and eventually they arranged for my OH to go to a day centre once a week (means tested which I pay for).
It won't alter your wife's behaviour but you need rest and respite yourself in order to continue looking after her.
I am also told that these behaviours don't always last so the thought that they might eventually change keeps me going.
Sorry if this isn't any help but I found knowing there are people who are experiencing the same thing on this website and who understands makes me feel less alone. I hope you find some way of making life easier for YOU.
My wife walked 10 miles today. My wife has early onset dementia. She is coherent and even sharp most of the time. Very forgetful in conversation. She doesn’t get lost, but the walking is getting out of hand. I worry she may hurt herself. We have good shoes and clothing. She carries a GPS and cell phone. Am I worried too much? It seems that 10 miles is too much, but I see no limping or evident foot problems. It’s hard to keep weight on her with all this exercise. The Dr keeps saying that safe walking is good for her
Hi Finigan58. My life is spent trying to keep my OH happy, He can revertto small child upset/tantrum otherwise, which is not good for either of us. If your wife isn’t getting lost and it keeps her occupied and happy I think you should just let her carry on. It will certainly keep her physically fit. You could try high calorie puddings e.g steam puddings, crumbles etc. to try and porridge etc. to try to maintain her weight. My husband used to go out most afternoon s for a walk, and I worried about him crossing the road( his dementia has made him partially sighted) or getting lost, Now he won’t go unless I go with him snd I miss the time to myself!! ….
When you say that she carries a gps, would you be able to tell me exactly what it is please?
Don’t know what GPS Finigan58 ‘s wife carries but my husband and I both have I phones, I have set up Findmyphone App on both of them, click on my App and it shows me on a map exactly where his mob(he) is. If mob was switched off or ran out of charge it will show last location- gives a starting point for searching. Had the added advantage that I lost my mob in a shop and we used his to successfully locate mine.
