Waiting for a diagnosis

[john51]

Hello
I have been in a similar position to your husband. Everything you say seems the same except the being picked up by the police and being sectioned. I was told several times by the memory service that I was too young to have dementia. I got the impression that they thought I was too lazy to do a decent days work. I was off work sick. I was only eventually taken seriously after my wife made a series of complaints through the PALs service for our local memory service. I got a series of cognitive tests a year apart. The doctor who did them said I was normal for a person who had studied to A level standard. Then came the problem of making them accept that I had degrees and responsible for training teachers as well as teaching children. The tests 2 years apart showed a big decline. Along with brain scans whih showed that I had had strokes I got a diagnosis of vascular dementia at 51.
DVLA revoked my license.
My employer tried to go down the incompetence route to dismiss me. I was lucky in that I had brilliant union support and got early retirement.
Getting the diagnosis is awful. You feel like you are a failure and your wolrd is ending but with the support of family and friends you can start to work with the new normal. Its always a new and changing normal but with the diagnosis comes support....so long as you keep working at getting the support. It needs those close to realise things ae changing and different support is needed.
For the first 2 years I went into a primary school as a volunteer to hear children read. That was good. I enjoyed it.
I would say keep at the memory service. If dementia is found use it to get support and establish a new normal
John

Hi , so glad I have found these forums. For the last 4 years my husband has been really struggling at work he was in a very stressful job but he was beginning to not be able to cope. He was advised to go on the sick and that was twelve months ago and although I see no worsening of his Cognitive Impairment there is no improvement. His sick notes fro GP just said fatigue. He had had scans blood tests memory tests and nothing until the police picked him up the other day for driving too close behind a vehicle. He was sectioned and held in a mental institution for assessment and later released. They are referring him back to the memory clinic . I am so fed up of going around in circles and do frightened if dementia is found. He is do slow just tired all the time and easily distracted . I would be grateful if someone who has been in this situation could advise

 

[Countryboy]

Hi , so glad I have found these forums. For the last 4 years my husband has been really struggling at work he was in a very stressful job but he was beginning to not be able to cope. He was advised to go on the sick and that was twelve months ago and although I see no worsening of his Cognitive Impairment there is no improvement. His sick notes fro GP just said fatigue. He had had scans blood tests memory tests and nothing until the police picked him up the other day for driving too close behind a vehicle. He was sectioned and held in a mental institution for assessment and later released. They are referring him back to the memory clinic . I am so fed up of going around in circles and do frightened if dementia is found. He is do slow just tired all the time and easily distracted . I would be grateful if someone who has been in this situation could advise

Hi Teddy 1960 I would imagine there are thousands that’s have been in similar situation unfortunately we don’t know your husbands age , however I was diagnosed at age 57 with Alzheimer’s it wasn’t until all I was receiving so much negative information about my future such as continuing to Work, or Driving , and when the bureaucrats started interfering I realized this was serious stuff so I dug deep let my survival instincts kick in and started challenge this Dementia Diagnoses after a couple of years I was sent for a PET brain scan and a SPECT scan unfortunately that showed damage to Frontal-Temporal-lobes I thought ok where do I go from here the fight goes on and with the help and support of my Occupational Therapist and Unison I fought to continue working and worked for a further 8 years until my retirement age 65 ok that wasn’t easy I also fought the DVLA for 12 years and was reinstated with a Full driving licence again not easy but it can be done , its almost twenty years for me now I I’m in fairly good health so who knows maybe another 20 years the point I’m trying to make is if I had listened to all the doom and gloom or all the negatives see the years I would have wasted I realize age could be a major factor as with any illness I’m assuming you husband it under 60 and its not easy but it is personal

 

[Teddy1960]

Hi Teddy 1960 I would imagine there are thousands that’s have been in similar situation unfortunately we don’t know your husbands age , however I was diagnosed at age 57 with Alzheimer’s it wasn’t until all I was receiving so much negative information about my future such as continuing to Work, or Driving , and when the bureaucrats started interfering I realized this was serious stuff so I dug deep let my survival instincts kick in and started challenge this Dementia Diagnoses after a couple of years I was sent for a PET brain scan and a SPECT scan unfortunately that showed damage to Frontal-Temporal-lobes I thought ok where do I go from here the fight goes on and with the help and support of my Occupational Therapist and Unison I fought to continue working and worked for a further 8 years until my retirement age 65 ok that wasn’t easy I also fought the DVLA for 12 years and was reinstated with a Full driving licence again not easy but it can be done , its almost twenty years for me now I I’m in fairly good health so who knows maybe another 20 years the point I’m trying to make is if I had listened to all the doom and gloom or all the negatives see the years I would have wasted I realize age could be a major factor as with any illness I’m assuming you husband it under 60 and its not easy but it is personal

 

[Teddy1960]

Hi there , thankyou for your message and yes my husband 57 your post is inspiring and I only wish my husband had the same determination as you.
I sometimes wonder about the diagnosis and if it is right on good days too.