Visiting Rules in care home

Discussion in 'Middle - later stages of dementia' started by Maggietyler1963, Sep 1, 2019.

  1. Maggietyler1963

    Maggietyler1963 New member

    Sep 1, 2019
    7
    We have just had a ding dong with senior at care home regarding spending lunch time there. This is supposed to be a home not a buisiness
     
  2. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    10,249
    Female
    South coast
    Hello @Maggietyler1963 and welcome to DTP.

    I could visit mum in her care home whenever I wished
    Is this a general rule for all visitors to all the residents, or is there a particular reason eg your person with dementia isnt eating while you are there?
     
  3. Louise7

    Louise7 Registered User

    Mar 25, 2016
    1,152
    Welcome to the forum. You don't give a lot of info but does the home have a strict 'no visiting at meal times' policy? I know that some homes would prefer that visitors avoid meal times as it can disrupt the routine but my Mum's home welcomes visitors at anytime. I frequently visit Mum during meal times and give her her food, freeing up the staff to spend more time with others who need more help. Hopefully you can come to some arrangement with the care home staff to avoid any future fall outs.
     
  4. SueHCA

    SueHCA New member

    Sep 1, 2019
    1
    Our home welcomes family anytime, we even feed them, our home is their home. xx
     
  5. Rosettastone57

    Rosettastone57 Registered User

    Oct 27, 2016
    976
    My mother-in-law was in a care home last year and family were welcome at any reasonable time
     
  6. MaNaAk

    MaNaAk Registered User

    Jun 19, 2016
    1,244
    Essex
    I used to visit dad at meal times and I have stayed for lunch and dinner. This used to help him settle down and eat. I also used to ask if I could come and have meals with dad and the home were very obliging.

    MaNaAk
     
  7. Shedrech

    Shedrech Volunteer Moderator

    Dec 15, 2012
    7,935
    Yorkshire
    Hello @Maggietyler1963
    A warm welcome to DTP
    I hope the resident wasn't upset

    Personally I would have a quiet chat with the manager tomorrow and ask what are the expectations around mealtimes and indeed any other times ... explaining that you would prefer to be able to visit and even eat with your resident (I did this at times but always let the staff know beforehand)

    Weekends can be a bit fraught with more visitors and probably only one member of the management team available
     
  8. Beate

    Beate Registered User

    May 21, 2014
    11,696
    Female
    London
    I've never understood "protected mealtimes". Who are they protecting from what? Surely it helps some people to eat with their family or at least have them around to help them? Of course, you shouldn't maybe turn up five of you with babies in tow, but shutting family out of mealtimes is absurd.
     
  9. northumbrian_k

    northumbrian_k Registered User

    Mar 2, 2017
    755
    Male
    Newcastle
    #9 northumbrian_k, Sep 1, 2019
    Last edited: Sep 1, 2019
    Some homes such as my wife's operate a protected meal time system to preserve the dignity of all residents. All of the ones I looked at had such a policy. Given notice - even on the day - I am able to stay with my wife and could have a meal. This is served not in the dining room with the other residents but in a separate space. This was explained before my wife's admission. I don't see it as a problem or unreasonable.
     
  10. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,360
    Kent
    I`m sure there are reasons for protected mealtimes in a communal dining room.

    Some residents may become distracted if too many people are in the room.
    Some visitors could be inconsiderate of other residents.
    Some behaviours at mealtime may be challenging.

    It`s always wise to consult with managers rather than presume.

    It is a home, but sadly because it is not a service provided by an LA it is a business.
     
  11. northumbrian_k

    northumbrian_k Registered User

    Mar 2, 2017
    755
    Male
    Newcastle
    It was put to me that some residents may have difficulty eating which can manifest in unusual behaviours. Those residents, or their representatives, may not wish others to witness these behaviours as they may seem odd and undignified. A care home should be home to every resident. Accepting the need for privacy during meal times may be more important than having a right to visit during those times.
     
  12. Louise7

    Louise7 Registered User

    Mar 25, 2016
    1,152
    I think that if a policy with regards visits at mealtimes was explained prior to admission then fair enough - people can choose to accept it or go elsewhere. It's not clear from the original post what the background to the 'ding dong' is though - is this is new policy that's just been introduced or something that has been in place since admission, and have the home explained the reasons for this?
     
  13. Cat27

    Cat27 Volunteer Moderator

    Feb 27, 2015
    10,167
    Merseyside
    I think this is very good advice from @Shedrech.
     
  14. Maggietyler1963

    Maggietyler1963 New member

    Sep 1, 2019
    7
    the protected meal time policy is supposed to be used to stop none urgent clinical care as in nurses visits not to stop anyone having a meal with the family .
     
  15. Louise7

    Louise7 Registered User

    Mar 25, 2016
    1,152
    Yes, I think that's the reasoning behind the 'protected mealtime' policy in NHS hospitals but what's the actual policy at the care home you visit and have they explained why the policy is in place? If not, as has been previously suggested, best to have a chat with the manger to find out the specific reasons why they don't want visits during mealtimes.
     
  16. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,360
    Kent
    This may be so but it is not the only reason. It is also to protect the privacy and dignity of residents as @northumfrian_k has observed.

     
  17. Maggietyler1963

    Maggietyler1963 New member

    Sep 1, 2019
    7
    I am about to start a complaint with cqc and the local gov ombudsman regarding visit restrictions specially regarding protected meal time policy. this is not personal centred care, everyone in a care home should be treated as if they was at home, I believe it goes against human rights to stop any resident having a meal with family or friends and if they don't want you in the dining room they should screen of a table for those family members who want to visit at meal times. I don't believe for one second it's because the residents don't like it and get challenging, or that it distracts the staff, if anything it helps the staff as i would be feeding my mum making a staff member free to do someone else. I am sorry to say it but it's more to do with the home/nurses not wanting you to witness what goes on at mealtimes. I am going to fight this all the way how dare they take away a residents right to a basic family life. I am a care assistant and i know how hard the job is but there is no excuse for the things i have witnessed in the care home my mother is in. I am scared to move her as shes only just moved in after her last home closed down. but my mother has gone from a clean tidy little lady sitting in her chair to a dishevelled mess that smells like a wet dog. If i could id be there every second of everyday to make sure shes being cared for.
     
  18. TNJJ

    TNJJ Registered User

    May 7, 2019
    342
    Hi.I have also worked in homes all over the County(Cornwall)some homes do have a meal time policy to protect the residents.If all families chose to come at meal times can you imagine the chaos?...Also as you know some residents will get up and walk away from the table and just go and do whatever they like.Not everybody will eat at a table.. There is never enough staff usually ,plus some of the staff will be running trays to rooms for people who don’t want to come to the table.People who have dietary needs(assisted to feed ,or who are at risk of aspiration are normally in the dining room)...As much as you want to allow a member of staff to be free to support another resident ,maybe they are worried that if your mother has a problem with eating and you are assisting her it could cause a problem...After all they are the ones with a Duty of Care and would be held accountable...
     
  19. Jintyf

    Jintyf Registered User

    Jun 14, 2013
    47
    My mothers home ask for advance notice if wanting to eat with Mum so they can let the kitchen know but there is no issue staying with during mealtimes if I want to do so.
    I can however appreciate that mealtimes are especially busy times for staff having to also help deliver meals to rooms, as well as feed those who can't feed themselves.
    So I try to avoid staying for meals unless I'm eating with Mum.
    In fact its often a good time to leave her as she has something to focus on so I'll often visit before a meal and leave as they are serving up.
     
  20. Xeenies

    Xeenies Registered User

    May 19, 2014
    70
    This is an interesting thread. My dads in a hospital atm. They have protected meal times as I think they consider it therapy time. Or dad has difficulty with his focus, others are receiving support to increase their independence. I can understand why visitors are not allowed and we respect our presence may make it worse. I would though not agree that a blanket policy is appropriate. I wouldn’t place my dad in a home that had that and I would argue lack of flexibility means that home is not providing an appropriate provision to meet Dads needs. As said he has the right to a family home and it is his life there. I would expect flexibility ie with notice, separate room etc.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.