visiting mum

lindaj

Registered User
Jan 15, 2007
30
Nottingham
Just got back from visiting mum in the assessment unit only my second time. I was a bit shocked to see quite a bit of violence between residents, the nurses intervene but I wasn't expecting this. Quite a few of the residents have black eyes etc. As my mum is disabled and not able to do much for herself she is very vunerable to anyone attacking her I know nurses are watching all the time but I still feel worried for her. Has anybody else experienced anything like this I just need some reassurance mum is going to be alright.
 

Áine

Registered User
Feb 22, 2006
994
sort of north east ish
Not surprised you're worried lindaj. My dad was somewhere just for a couple of weeks where I was anxious that one of the other guys wanted to have a go at him. They seem so vulnerable there. HAve you talked to the staff about it?
 

lindaj

Registered User
Jan 15, 2007
30
Nottingham
Yes I did have a word with the staff they say she will be fine they are supposed to be keeping an extra eye on her, but I think when I go again I will speak to them again. I am not at all happy mum could be in there for another month shes been in for one week I will be glad when shes been fully assessed.

It is so nice to be able to chat to other people about any problems I come across it makes me feel alot better.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
71,755
Kent
Hi Linda, From my limited experience I think residents are unlikely to be violent to someone who doesn`t pose a threat. The violence usually occurs when there is thought to be a challenge of some sort.
I think you are right to be concerned about your mother, for even if she is not at risk of being a victim of violence, it would still be upsetting for her to witness it.
I would certainly discuss it with staff. Love Sylvia x
 

lindaj

Registered User
Jan 15, 2007
30
Nottingham
Hi Sylvia

I think you could be right I did notice that the violence came from those who were wondering all the time, I never had thought of that. Mum just lays in a special chair sleeping causing no trouble. I feel better now thanks for that. xx
 

Brucie

Registered User
Jan 31, 2004
12,413
near London
lindaj said:
Quite a few of the residents have black eyes etc.
It is worth bearing in mind that black eyes are not necessarily caused by violence from one individual to another.

With dementia, people lose spatial awareness, sometimes the ability to control thir movements, and they bump their head into things.

My wife has had a number of black eyes, all through falling against walls etc, sometimes even when two or more members of staff are caring for her. It just happens. Not nice, but not one person being violent against another..
lindaj said:
I did notice that the violence came from those who were wandering all the time
Yes, when it happens, it is most likely that way.
 

dmc

Registered User
Mar 13, 2006
1,157
hi lindaj

brucie is quite right in what he says about black eyes my mum had two lovely shiners from bumping her forehead a few weeks ago.
ive been through 3 hospitals with my mum all dementia units and the only squabbles ive seen is by the more mobile residents, and its usually if they sit in each other's chairs, so if your mum is less mobile im sure she'l be fine.
 
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Lila13

Registered User
Feb 24, 2006
1,342
Can only hope she'll be all right.

(I've seen violence between people who were mostly immobile, and unless you just happen to be there you don't know what happened or whom to believe. I'm talking about events seen in hospital not my mother who luckily only hit my brother and me and 2 careworkers.)
 
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