Visiting. Honestly what is the real risk now?

Quizbunny

Registered User
Nov 20, 2011
156
0
Does the role also not include mental health wellbeing? I do not provide physical care for my husband but I believe that I am the person/should be the person who is essential to his mental health wellbeing. And yes, I admit it - to my mental health wellbeing as well. We are still married and to me still come as one package.
Yes it certainly does include providing mental health support. Unfortunately some people hear ‘essential care giver’ and just assume it’s all about personal care
 

TNJJ

Registered User
May 7, 2019
2,967
0
cornwall
Does the role also not include mental health wellbeing? I do not provide physical care for my husband but I believe that I am the person/should be the person who is essential to his mental health wellbeing. And yes, I admit it - to my mental health wellbeing as well. We are still married and to me still come as one package.
It does yes. I am at dads about 5 hours at a time and I do not wear PPE unless I need to. I’m the one providing dvds that I know he likes . Also some form of conversation although dad is limited on that these days. I used to take him out but cannot do that now as it requires 2 to move him and take him out.I use PPE when with a carer as they are always in and out of houses but it is usually only the 2 of us most of the day so I don’t need it for just dad.
 

MartinWL

Registered User
Jun 12, 2020
2,025
0
67
London
I feel that you may be right @MartinWL. It was my failure to provide essential care for my wife - personal care most especially - and to do so day in day out for 24 hours that was a key factor in her move to a care home in the first place. It took a while, but the staff got on top of her needs and she is clearly so much better cared for now than when living with me. For me to suggest that I am now needed in the role of "essential care giver" would be nonsense . I have seen this suggested by others as a way to get around current visiting rules and restrictions. For my particular circumstances that would seem wrong-headed if not unethical.

I speak to staff on my visits and all of them are looking forward to the time when they no longer have to wear PPE for 12+ hours a day. In the meantime - leaving aside the question of efficacy - I am prepared to go along with the need to book visits, take a test and wear PPE when I visit. This has been the case for so long now that my wife, if she notices at all, seems totally untroubled.
@northumbrian_k You certainly ought not to regard being unable to deliver all the necessary care as failure. It sounds more like you were heroic to the last! So many people find it difficult to come to terms with the fact that a point comes when care at home by one person is just not enough.
 

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