update to help wanted by roann


Registered User
Jan 19, 2006
was not a chest infection but pnmonia and a urinal infection got just 48hours try and get undercontrol by antibiotics and keep his temp down or they want to send him to hospital . He does not want to go. hates hospitals always as. even had it written in his notes. what do i do . he is as you know from (help message) that he is at stage 6-7 . he is confortable ,eating, broths , porrage, but finding drinks even with thickener hard to swollow. and tablets hard ,he chewing them but ley are slow releace not good must taste uke. sleeping a lot of the time. i hope he will respond soon. do i honor his wish to stay at home no matter what the outcome or do i send him in to hospital against his long held views. I WOULD LIKE TO HEAR YOUR VIEWS.


Registered User
Jan 4, 2006
Hiya Roann,
I think that my mum is at a similar stage, though in a Nursing Home. All I can do is recount a conversation I had with dad last week; I asked him what we would do if mum were to get pneumonia: "Treat it. As long as she is not in pain, we keep going. I still enjoy being with her; she doesn't seem unhappy'. My dad is not ready to let go yet - are you? Yes, you must consider your husband's views about hospital, but you also have to be able to live with yourself. No-one else can answer this one for you; think carefully, look into your heart, you will know what is the right decision - and whichever decision you make, it will be the right one for you and your husband. And you have friends here who will support you.
Love Helen


Registered User
Nov 28, 2005
Whatever your decision it will be the right one. It may not be of much help to you but my thoughts would go towards nursing care at home. Alot will depend on what is on offer to you, but it might be worth asking if nursing help is available. After all that would save a much needed hospital bed. It would help you and avoid an upset with your husband (my husband also hates hospital and refused to go even when he had a stroke, so I do understand your predicament).

It might be worth you asking if the NHS does support 'nursing at home' or whether that is only available privately.

Anyway I truly hope the antibiotics work and this problem goes away at least for the present. Good luck and best wishes Beckyjan


Registered User
Jun 27, 2006
Roan he absolutely must NOT chew the slow release tablets - if he does they are no longer slow release, and depending on what they are, could cause an overdose.