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Update -mum.

Discussion in 'End of life care' started by garfield3, Oct 9, 2019.

  1. garfield3

    garfield3 Registered User

    Jun 30, 2018
    170
    Hello all,

    Mum survived the night. Spoke to the deputy manager today. Usual Dr came out today. Does have chest infection, lost swallow been given just in case meds via cannula. Is very poorly but different this time. Not eating or drinking. Got a temp and very restless.terminal restless? ? Still unresponsive. Sleeping a lot. What gets me is how quick it has happened. 2 weeks since she got cold. When I saw her in August she looked different. Couldn't put my finger on it.

    Any ideas how long? no mottling yet.

    Thanks for listening. xx
     
  2. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,578
    Kent
    I don`t think anyone can tell you @garfield3/Sue. It`s just a painful waiting game.

    I hope your mother is comfortable and pain free.
     
  3. garfield3

    garfield3 Registered User

    Jun 30, 2018
    170

    Thanks for your reply. What gets to me is that she has gone downhill so fast. She had a cold a couple of weeks ago.and now at this stage. Am thinking that maybe she was /is a lot further along than I /
    we first thought.
     
  4. Shedrech

    Shedrech Volunteer Moderator

    Dec 15, 2012
    8,035
    Yorkshire
    my thoughts are with you @garfield3
    I too was surprised at how quickly dad went once the chest infection took hold, and similarly he'd had a couple of chest infections before that he bounced back from but this time was different somehow, I guess he was just exhausted ... but that's dad's experience and everyone's is so individual
    sending you both a blanket of sympathy
     
  5. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    10,531
    Female
    South coast
    ((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))) @garfield3
    Unfortunately there is no knowing how long. Mum went 17 days with no food or fluid, but she always was stubborn and most people do not usually go that long.
    You will know when she is reaching the very end as her breathing will change with lots of gaps between breaths.
    Look after yourself in the meantime - make sure you eat and sleep.
     
  6. garfield3

    garfield3 Registered User

    Jun 30, 2018
    170
    Thanks Shedrichech for your insite. Yes, a very individual journey. The waiting game now! !
     
  7. garfield3

    garfield3 Registered User

    Jun 30, 2018
    170
    Thanks for your insight too.the circle of life goes on....
     
  8. Canadian Joanne

    Canadian Joanne Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 8, 2005
    16,110
    Toronto, Canada
    My mother suddenly developed a fever and was gone in 9 days. No prior illnesses or anything like that so you can imagine what a state of shock we were in.

    This is a hard and difficult time. I hope that your mother is kept comfortable and you take care of yourself.
     
  9. Mouse2014

    Mouse2014 Registered User

    Mar 9, 2014
    42
    I am so sorry you are going through this.

    My Mum had shingles and a chest infection in July, discharged from hospital to nursing home, back into hospital a Week later with dehydration and delirium, she had 2 further chest infections whilst in hospital, the consultant advised there was little more they could do given her inability to wake to eat/drink so she was discharged on 6/8/19 was told that the hypoactive delirium (sleepy/lethargic) Would make recovery difficult so decision not to readmit to hospital was taken. Mum barely ate or drank for a good 3 weeks due to her sleepiness, and in the final week she was unconscious, had pain, secretion and agitation medication via a syringe driver and she died on 3/9/19. It was nearly a month for her, bless her but everyone’s different...I m so sorry
     

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