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Undiagnosed memory problems and a house move = disaster!! Help please


Registered User
Apr 23, 2015
Here goes, My grandmother has undiagnosed memory problems that have become worse over the past 4 years. They impact upon daily life but my grandfather refused to take her to the GP out of respect for her. I am a nurse and its been hard to watch. Yesterday they moved from their home of over 30 years to a bungalow on the same street as my parents and my sister. The idea being that they would be closer to family support. Everyone knew it was the worst thing for my grandmother but best for my grandfather.
Any way my darling grandmother is predictably in tears and frightened asking to go home and becoming very distressed. She has forgotten who my grandfather is twice in the past 24 hours and gone to my mothers house telling her there is a mad man in her home. She also is an insulin dependent diabetic and took too much insulin yesterday. I have dealt with the medication and educated everyone as best I can. I have put a note on the inside of the front door saying ' this is your new home, the bungalow'. My Mum is in shock at how much my grandmother has gone down hill and is already wondering how she will cope. I have suggested a 'on call' rota for the family so we all get a break. But we need help and we need help quickly. She has an appointment with the new GP on Wed but how or can we get help and advice before then. How long does it even take to get a diagnosis. Im feeling really lost and would appreciate any help or advice


Registered User
Sep 21, 2013
I feel for you .My Mother in law took 4 months for diagnosis .We fetched her to visit us for Christmas as she always did in 2012 but did not want to go home. She was diagnosed with VD by the April. Moving closer to family will be the best. We are alone my husband is the only child and I have done most of caring. Its hard as I have had to reduce my working hrs to less than 1/2 but no way would we put her in a home. She is getting a lot worse but we will cope.
We put lables o all doors to help her find her way did the same when went on holiday 2 yrs ago and again last year.We wont be going this year she would not cope. So lables on all doors might help .Good luck


Registered User
May 2, 2015
My mum was diagnosed with mixed dementia two days ago although I have known she has had it a couple of years. I kept getting fobbed off by her GP, there was always a physical problem with mum and GP always said let's get this sorted first, etc anyway her physical problems never got sorted, eventually got her on waiting list for Memory Clinic which seems to be the only place on the NHS to get a diagnosis and got fed up with waiting. Latest is the Memory Clinic said as she is in hospital we can't see her for at least 2 months because we have to be certain that the hospital stay and/or infection is well out of the way until she is assessed. On Wednesday I gave up and spoke to a private psychiatrist who visited her the next day, diagnosed her there and then and put her on appropriate medication within 24 hours. It was £280 well spent and I wish I had done it months ago.
A move/illness/hospital stay always speeds up dementia but don't feel bad you would only have been delaying the inevitable and you have to think of your grandfather and what's best for the carers. Good luck hope you get a diagnosis and appropriate medication soon.