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Unaware?

Nicky1973

New member
Mar 23, 2022
7
0
My father in law seems to be moving into a new stage. More and more often, when asked something, he just looks vacant. He looks at you but makes no attempt to answer. Doing the simplest of tasks is a real struggle, and when you ask him to get something, it's anyone's guess what he'll come back with!!

I was talking to a friend and was trying to find a way to describe it and the word that came was "unaware". He's unaware of everything, of how things work, of what's appropriate, of how to take care of himself. He's unaware that he shouldn't leave the doors wide open when he leaves the house or turn the fridge off. He's unaware of what day / time it is or what he's watching on TV. And it got me thinking, when he stands in the kitchen spending 10 mins folding closed the teabag bag, when he can't work out if he's took his tablets or not, when he's eating beef stew for breakfast or making tea without water, when he goes to find a plaster and comes back with 7 different types of tape... Does he know that it's not 'normal' or is he just unaware that that's what he's doing? Is he aware of feeling different, does it feel like there's something 'wrong'. He seems quite content at the moment (although I know that will probably change) but all he does it sit in his chair and stare at the TV. Can he really not know that something is seriously wrong with him? It would be nice to think that he doesn't.

I'm not sure if this makes sense or if anyone knows the answer but I just needed to put it out there so it stops taking up so much headspace.
 

Bod

Registered User
Aug 30, 2013
1,544
0
Yes, he can really not know there are problems, he has no memory of what the "good" times were.
He now needs 24/7 care, to ensure his needs are met, food, medication, etc.

Bod
 

nae sporran

Volunteer Host
Oct 29, 2014
9,139
0
Bristol
That is a worrying development, @Nicky1973.
Do you look after your father in law at home or is he on his own ? I was just thinking along the same lines as @Bod, but wondering if outside carers to help with things like medication might be needed if he would not accept a care home.
 

Nicky1973

New member
Mar 23, 2022
7
0
Thank you for your replies @Bod @Pork Pie lady & @nae sporran
He lives alone and after a long battle with him he has finally agreed to trial having a carer come in to help with meds / meals. That starts on Monday and can't come quick enough...it feels like we'll get a bit of breathing space, for a while away. We're there almost daily to make sure the meds are correct and to make sure he's eaten, so having that part taken care of will be a huge help. I just hope he's okay with it and keeps it going.
The next battle will be a care home, as we know that where it's heading.