Well I've had a weeks 'respite' first time ever, picking him up tomorrow. Son told me I should have opted for two weeks, but although I do feel its gone too quickly, I'd rather do one week again in the not too distant future.

 

Just reading 'the selfish pigs guide to caring' it's a must for all carers.. So much confermation of everything we go through.. and ways to cope without beeting ourselves up... (wish my OH could read and understand it) it sure has made me feel more positive about the situation I'm in.. even on bad days without the guilt..

 

Hello to everyone.
I care for my wife who was 57 when we were told she had alzheimers, that was five years ago now.
I would like to here from any one young like her, I wish I could meet other couples to share what we are going through, it drive me round the bend and her going to these dementia cafes where most people are a lot older, I must say that as a full time carer for her I don't get much time to sit in front on my laptop.
That's all for now.
007 I wish

 

There are quite a few of us in our 60s with husbands who are older. I feel robbed rather of what should be the good years of retirement, but hey at least we're not dead!

I too don't fancy dementia cafes - one person with dementia is enough! LOL

 

Hello @007 I wish and welcome to DTP
I am 62 and care for my OH who is 63. We should both be working, enjoying the grandkids and planning our retirement, but instead OH does nothing and Im stuck indoors with him.

 

OMG how can a new pair of pyjamas be so stressful!! Put new pj's on the OH tonight and he's taken them off 3 times now. Came downstairs in total confusion because there is a 'pee hole' with a button on the fly. His other pj's don't have fly and he can't understand he can just pull them up and down like his old pj's!! He's back again with pair of underpants on top now!!

 

Can you sew the fly up - obviously not whilst he is wearing them.

 

Finally gave in and put him back in old pair. He has dementia but it's me that's being driven mad!!! Good idea will sew them up as bought 2 pair.

 

I've just bought some new PJs for my Dad and gone for shorts and Tshirts which he really likes. No more buttons or struggling to get his leg in without ripping the hem.

 

Blimey I am almost glad that dad sleeps naked, only almost though.

 

I try to find clothes that are more in keeping with my husband's condition but he also goes back to wearing what he's used to. It's hard work and you're only trying to do what is best for them. At the moment I'm taking a break from trying to find his electric razor which has suddenly disappeared.

 

I'm there!!! bottle washing and general duties? BRING IT ON!!!

 

It takes me nearly an hour to get my OH dressed in a morning.. (4.am)..including all his incontinence stuff.. by then I usually grab anything for me to wear... as he's wandering off and ready for a cup of tea... Only later in the day when someone calls with shopping or something do I notice what I look like... Someone who has been rough sleeping.. Including hair which I ptobably haven't brushed.. Make up a thing of the past...

 

Think I frightened myself getting a glimpse of an unfamiliar woman In the mirror.. Years older than me.. Good job going out is a fare treat.. My OH though always looks neat and tidy....!!!!!

 

My husband can still use his electric razor but I wouldn't go so far as to call it having a shave, just shows the razor to his face. That's when we can find his razor. It took me half an hour this morning to find where he'd left it.

 

Dad shaves often, about 3 times a day with his electric razor. He rarely has a wash though.

 

Oh Linton, dont you think maybe time for a care home? I am seriously thinking its not far off for my OH. I also get terrible broken nights, but I can at least leave him to go out for a few hours, and he isn't incontinent yet. I know it costs a small fortune but this needs weighing against the toll on our health of sleep deprivation and stress.

 

Hi Roseleigh.. Thanks for the reply.. I know I have to think about it in the future.. Can't bear it though... Last nigh every hour my OH asked me the time... Then at four wants to get up.. I gently explained how tired I was and that my days were full of 'heavy' work with all the help he needs... He was so sweet.. Saying tonight would be different now he knows.. I had put the guilt on him... So now I feel dreadful... Really nasty person cause I know he can't help it...!!!!!