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Too much energy?

christyj-

Registered User
Jan 3, 2022
19
0
I have a 62 year old dad with Early Onset Alzheimers.
When looking at information about it, I often read about people having low energy, or wandering at night, bad sleep etc.
Does anyone struggle with getting their person to rest? My dad is constantly looking for something to do, he has more energy than any of us, and it's quite exhausting keeping him busy. He often looks for jobs to do around the house and finds stuff he shouldn't be doing really. He goes for dog walks (I keep track of him on his phone) for 3-4 hours and hes just started going for runs again. I'm thankful that he sleeps well at night for now, and I don't want him doing nothing, but he's almost like a toddler trying to keep him entertained.

He isn't in early stages by any means, I'm just quite baffled by his energy sometimes, and wondered if anyone else experiences this in younger dementia patients?
 

Annier68

New member
Oct 9, 2021
7
0
My husband 53 walks the dog for 3/4 hours and 2 shorter walks too. He’s become obsessed with steps on his phone. I go with it as he meets people and chats and enjoys being alone in his thoughts with the stress free company of our dog. He is always busy but as you say it often isn’t helpful/safe. I try to encourage routine morning jobs hooover and windows which he enjoys sometime something else if I’m about and can assist . Lunch then long dog walk. Bed time is getting later and later as it is taking him longer to get ready. I’m trying to to get him to bed earlier but feels like another nag.

Sorry I’ve no advice but I’m hoping the long walks mean he sleeps well as if he doesn’t get out he can be up through the night.

Take care x
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
7,932
0
Southampton
my mum used to take an hour and more to put her nightdress on, inside out, back to front. my mum didnt have dementia but breast cancer which travelled to her brain. they started to prepare for bed late so he was very late by the time she was ready. i said to dad to see if she would get ready earlier so he wasnt waiting and late in bed. it did work as she started earlier to get ready. would that work for your husband?
 

christyj-

Registered User
Jan 3, 2022
19
0
My husband 53 walks the dog for 3/4 hours and 2 shorter walks too. He’s become obsessed with steps on his phone. I go with it as he meets people and chats and enjoys being alone in his thoughts with the stress free company of our dog. He is always busy but as you say it often isn’t helpful/safe. I try to encourage routine morning jobs hooover and windows which he enjoys sometime something else if I’m about and can assist . Lunch then long dog walk. Bed time is getting later and later as it is taking him longer to get ready. I’m trying to to get him to bed earlier but feels like another nag.

Sorry I’ve no advice but I’m hoping the long walks mean he sleeps well as if he doesn’t get out he can be up through the night.

Take care x
Sounds very similar! I mostly worry for the dog as he's getting older, but luckily he seems okay for now. I know in most sense, it's good that they're getting the exercise and pre-occupying themselves. But it is a worry for when they cross the line of it being dangerous for them to do it alone. I dread to think sometimes what he's actually getting up to, or who he's chatting with etc. How long has your husband been diagnosed (if you dont mind me asking?)

I can sympathise with the later nights going to bed, I always expect him to be shattered by 9/10 but he seems to still have plenty of energy. I am slightly dreading the longer days/lighter nights in summer, as he will want to be up and about even longer!

I wish I had his energy.
 

Annier68

New member
Oct 9, 2021
7
0
Hi,

He was finally diagnosed in November last year so very recently. We’d first visited the doctors in 2018 though so it’s been a long process as he’s only 53. I have the very same worries about being safe on roads and with dog. I track him on google maps as you can share location. It’s not perfect but gives me a rough idea. He used to cycle but after getting lost twice stopped. There’s been odd occasion he’s had to ask for help to get back...he wouldn’t think to call me. We’ve told lots of people in our community so people often join him on a walk or help him out. I can’t think about what will happen when he can’t walk alone. I work full time and have 2 children. I mentioned a befriended today to take him fishing or hill walking but the reaction wasn’t good to say the least.

I’m hoping getting into a routine helps...but what do I know !!
 

christyj-

Registered User
Jan 3, 2022
19
0
Hi,

He was finally diagnosed in November last year so very recently. We’d first visited the doctors in 2018 though so it’s been a long process as he’s only 53. I have the very same worries about being safe on roads and with dog. I track him on google maps as you can share location. It’s not perfect but gives me a rough idea. He used to cycle but after getting lost twice stopped. There’s been odd occasion he’s had to ask for help to get back...he wouldn’t think to call me. We’ve told lots of people in our community so people often join him on a walk or help him out. I can’t think about what will happen when he can’t walk alone. I work full time and have 2 children. I mentioned a befriended today to take him fishing or hill walking but the reaction wasn’t good to say the least.

I’m hoping getting into a routine helps...but what do I know !!
Ah I see, so you're still very much adjusting in the same way as us!

My dad is completely in denial of any problem, so we have to just work around him as much as we can and hope for the best. Yes, they often don't take suggestions for things to do very well, as they dont want to be 'babied', but sometimes its just a suggestion for something different to do too! My dad similarly gets lost, if he's outside of a zone he's comfortable with. I track his phone and often see him going round in circles or walking back from where he came. He must be getting lost as he always says ' I don't know where I've been, I just keep walking!' which doesn't fill me with confidence! It's comforting to know that we aren't the only people having a similar problem. I know so much advice says that you shouldn't leave them alone or let them walk alone, so you often wonder if you're doing the right thing. But every case is different and you can only do your best I suppose!

I can't imagine how hard it is trying to navigate all of this with 2 children and working full time. I hope you manage to get into a bit of a routine with him at least.
 

Annier68

New member
Oct 9, 2021
7
0
We’ve had great support. We were advised to tell people in our community so everyone can look out for him and help if necessary. This has been invaluable to keeping him as independent as possible although it was incredibly hard to do especially before diagnosis. I couldn’t keep him in and can just make things as safe as possible. I’ve also completed the Herbert protocol. It is good to know we’re not alone and the picture of the wee old person with a blanket isn’t what dementia looks like for all. X
 

jennifer1967

Registered User
Mar 15, 2020
7,932
0
Southampton
thats what ive done and he has cards in his wallet that says hes confused, his name and my contact number. the neighbours when they see him will ask how he is and if hes alright. i dont think that its good to keep a secret then theres not the stigma attached to it. he goes on the bus and we have a checklist of what he needs, inhaler, bus pass etc and its done so often that he will check as well. he goes to mens shed and they know there and just keep an eye on him. i want to give as much freedom as he is able to cope with for as long as possible. its good for his confidence and self-esteem.
 

christyj-

Registered User
Jan 3, 2022
19
0
thats what ive done and he has cards in his wallet that says hes confused, his name and my contact number. the neighbours when they see him will ask how he is and if hes alright. i dont think that its good to keep a secret then theres not the stigma attached to it. he goes on the bus and we have a checklist of what he needs, inhaler, bus pass etc and its done so often that he will check as well. he goes to mens shed and they know there and just keep an eye on him. i want to give as much freedom as he is able to cope with for as long as possible. its good for his confidence and self-esteem.
I think we would struggle to do this as dad always rifles through his wallet, and as he is in complete denial, I think he would probably lose his temper over it. Sometimes the triggers aren't worth it.

I hope this keeps working for you and he can maintain his independence. It's very important for your mental health too! I think it's great that he can go somewhere and have people who will keep an eye on him too. You can definitely keep adapting to keep this sort of thing on the cards for him too.
 

christyj-

Registered User
Jan 3, 2022
19
0
We’ve had great support. We were advised to tell people in our community so everyone can look out for him and help if necessary. This has been invaluable to keeping him as independent as possible although it was incredibly hard to do especially before diagnosis. I couldn’t keep him in and can just make things as safe as possible. I’ve also completed the Herbert protocol. It is good to know we’re not alone and the picture of the wee old person with a blanket isn’t what dementia looks like for all. X
That's fantastic. We have told his friends and some neighbours in case he comes off a little off with them. I think I will look into some form of 'wandering support' for him. I trust he will find his way back for now, but I'm definitely waiting for the day when he doesn't.

Our trouble is there's a lot of contacts that we don't know about. So dad has a lot of old friends, or old work mates who we don't have a way of contacting. You can only reach as far as you're able, and hope the message is passed on down the line.

Have you found that your husband has accepted his dementia? We've obviously had a diagnosis, and its been brought up a few times gently. But he declares nothing is wrong with him, and doesn't seem worried by his changes in behaviour or lack of memory. It's unawareness more than denial as he can't seem to even comprehend what we're worried about. It's strange how some people with dementia have a total understanding of how they are changing, and others dont.

I'm glad to hear you've had good support from the community, it really makes a hell of difference knowing people are looking out for them!
 

Annier68

New member
Oct 9, 2021
7
0
I’m not sure if it helps but I’ve asked people to let other people know. It’s difficult telling people anyway so this has really helped. I’ve explained it’s to keep him safe.
He has accepted it but we first went to doctor in 2018 so it’s been a long process. He gets so frustrated about not being able to do things and it came to a head in sept after a period of deterioration he told the doctor he was worthless and better off not here. That triggered a scan earlier than intended, OT assessments and led to diagnosis. Medication since Nov has really helped he’s more motivated and although needs reminding, support and lots of organising can complete some jobs around the house. Before he was very passive and just sat. Work was a big part of his identity and not being able to work is awful for him. So some jobs round house in morning....it’s never been so well hoovered and walk dog in afternoon then kids are home from school. That’s hardest bit just now as he finds it hard to keep up with their lives so tends to stay out the way which is hard for them.
He refuses to go to groups or participate in anything but that may change. It’s first time I’ve seen him angry when it was suggested. I don’t know what we’d do without our dog.
Take care x
 

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