Too degrading?

[ceroc46]

Morning all,

Just looking for opinions re keeping mum a bit more occupied. She has very limited mobility, very bad hearing, very bad sight, with no interest in anything. She does fidget at times so I looked on the Alzheimer's site and they have a sensory cushion which looks nice but quite pricey. So getting to the point, if I bought a child's toy, do you think this is too degrading, in as much she has now got to her second childhood, and this is as good as it gets?

Doesn't seem that long since I stopped buying toys for my kids but now doing it again,only with a heavy heart this time.

Fran x

 

[Noorza]

Whatever brings your poor Mum comfort is not degrading IMO, it's a loving thing to do.

 

[CollegeGirl]

Hi Fran

Doll therapy is a tried and tested method of giving comfort to some dementia sufferers. Do you think she would like a doll, or a cuddly toy (with different textures) to hold, care for and fiddle with?

It's not degrading, in my opinion, to try to find something that would make your mum more content.

Good luck and keep us posted x

 

[lilysmybabypup]

Absolutely not degrading, Dad would often reach out and seem to stroke the cat, except he was in hospital and then a CH for a very short time. He was almost blind and really loved his real cat at home, so I searched for a plush toy that felt soft and had the right shape. I ended up with a dog because it was half laying down, had a long tail and was so soft. He loved holding it on his lap and stroking it. I found it hard to lie about it so I said it was his special furry friend rather than saying it was his cat. It brought him much comfort in his final weeks and that's all that matters. You do whatever you think will work, your mum is living in a different reality now and if it helps it can't be a bad thing. Good luck and I hope it helps.

Stephanie, xxx

 

[Rageddy Anne]

Everyone needs a teddy bear, no matter what age they are. I got one for my mother's 80th birthday...and discovered she'd never had one, as she was the middle one of seven and missed out! Marmaduke went everywhere with her, and I know he brought her comfort.

 

[Shash7677]

What about one of the sensory blankets you can get for young children? You know with the mirrors and crinkley bits on them?

Or if you are a crafty kind of person (in the arty sense) maybe make something or ask someone else to. That way it's personal and it's not been brought from a children's shop. Plus you will know what is of interest and of what isn't that way it's tailor made?

Sharon

 

[sajimjo]

I think something warm and cuddly would be lovely, perhaps some kind of doll or teddy which can be undressed? It is a long time since I bought childrens toys so have no idea what is available.

Don't think my XOH would appreciate a soft toy though. I have been trying to think of something suitable for him as he keeps fiddling, he is continuously unbuttoning and buttoning up his cardigan, or doing up the zip (if it has a zip) which gets him so annoyed!!!!!!!!

Think we could all do with something warm and cuddly at times!

Sarah

 

[Sunbell]

Certainly not degrading at all!

My mum had a doll for the last couple of years of her life and it was a godsend. I really don't know how we would have managed without it. It was her 'real' baby and went everywhere with her, so comforting for her.

Also mum was hard of hearing and had bad cataracts but I got a shoe box and filled it with all sorts of objects i.e. comb, pen, wool, brooches, small zipped purse, coins, bits of lace and anything she could feel and fiddle with.

Also I used to take odd balls of wool and start her off winding it and then she would re-wind it over and over again. Just something to keep her hands occupied.

Hope these might help your mum as they did for my lovely mum.

Take care, Sunbell xx

 

[lilysmybabypup]

Some people get a handbag for the ladies and pop all the bits and pieces in there. The sorts of things Sunbell suggested, but in a handbag. It's easy to reach in and fidget or pull things out even if she is sight impaired, and it looks a little more "ladylike" and age appropriate.

Stephanie, xxx

 

[starryuk]

Handbag full of bits sounds a good idea.

I have to admit...(I look after my 3 year old granddaughter once a week) to enjoying playing with the dolls and dressing and undressing them!!

 

[sistermillicent]

I would just try it and see and if it gets chucked back at you put it away and bring it out again a while later. my mum never took to this sort of thing though.

Sarah, you might consider getting some locks mounted on a piece of board, with their keys attached by chains. I saw this in one of the care homes i looked around for mum and asked about it, they said it was something the men loved to fiddle with.

 

[sajimjo]

Sounds a good idea Sistermillicent, thank you. My partner was a joiner also has AD (but not too bad yet) - we still have loads of ironmongery of all kinds, just needs time and a bit of ingenuity to put something together. I also used to love sowing and making things, but I don't seem to find the time these days! but would love to fiddle and make something to occupy these unfortunate people.

You could buy a basic teddy or doll and make a rough waistcoat out of felt (as it does not fray) with one button or press stud, cut a length of fabric or ribbon for a scarf, perhaps the toe end of a sock for a hat!!!!!!! - it just requires some imagination.

Sarah

 

[lin1]

Fran
Its not degrading at all.

Anything that gives comfort, happiness can only be good
My Mum adored her teddy.
I used to play with the teddy with my mum

 

[FifiMo]

Even if your mum's sight and hearing are not great there activities that can play to other senses like touch and smell. You can play 'guess what is in the bag' and use things with different textures and smells. Pears soap was a smell that my mother always recognised. Cinnamon too. Simple objects like a fork, a corkscrew, even textures like bubble wrap will give her things to explore.

If fidgeting is her thing, then you could make her a fidget apron. Buy an apron then sew on things for her to explore. The type of things you can use include, a zip for her to open and close. Velcro to pull apart. Get an apron with a big picket on the front, buy a mini teddy bear and attach it to the inside of the pocket with some string or tape. Sew on some buttons. Look around for bits of fabric with textures...maybe some lace, then satin, something woollen, some towelling off an old towel, You can also put some treats in the pocket as a surprise for her to find, a little bar or chocolate or some of her favourite sweets perhaps. Another thing that was popular was to put a stress ball in the pocket. Look out for some big beads and string them on to some string or cord then sew both ends to the apron...just make sure the beads are secure and if you see her trying to put them in her mouth then cut them off and remove them to avoid accidents.

Fiona

 

[FifiMo]

For anyone who likes to sew and on the theme of rummaging, my mother loved this. Very easy to make and I made some fabric dolls and a dog for inside. She spent hours opening and closing it and every time she found the dolls she was surprised.

My friend made her dad a barn and filled hers with those plastic farm sets that you can buy. Like mum, her dad loved rummaging and setting the animals out in the fields.
You could also make a garage and put some cars in or maybe some tools eg scanners.

They are a great idea for kids as well.

http://uklassinus.blogspot.co.uk/2008/08/fabric-dollhouse-tutorial.html

Fiona

 

[copsham]

This is a great idea. Could imagine my mum liking a dolls house. I am sure she would sort it out "for the grandchildren".