toiletting (sorry to mention it)

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by clayshant, Jun 19, 2005.

  1. clayshant

    clayshant Registered User

    Jun 19, 2005
    3
    A friend has a problem;his wife gets up from the toilet sometimes and forgets to wipe. he is terribly embarrassed and the thought of going in with her is appalling; it only happens sometimes.

    I have suggested making sure the toilet roll is in front of her, and maybe even putting up a twee little notice, of the "have you wiped nice and carefully? Now wash your little hands" variety. I can't really think if anything else but surely someone else may have a bright idea?? (How I hate the disease.)
     
  2. Jude

    Jude Registered User

    Dear Clayshant,

    A notice may help for a while, but it's only going to be a short term solution if it works at all.

    I know this can be an embarrassing problem, but really the only way is to go into the loo and give slow and clear instructions. Later on in to the illness it's going to be a matter of your friend doing the 'hands on' bit. It takes a bit of getting used to, but if you think of AD sufferers as being like young children, then it does help. After a while it just becomes part of the routine of caring.

    Best wishes,

    Jude
     
  3. Norman

    Norman Registered User

    Oct 9, 2003
    4,348
    Birmingham Hades
    Hi Clayshant
    one of the difficulties with Dementia is that it almost impossible to learn new ways or anything new really.
    From time to time I have to give instructions to my wife,toilet is one.
    Be very careful to make the instruction look more like a suggestion,otherwise you may get"don't talk to me like that I am not a child"
    Hope this helps
    Norman.
     
  4. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    Hi Clayshant

    Yes, yet another nightmare.

    When I spoke to the doctors about Jan, when she was on one of her assessments and I was already under pressure, caring for her at home, they asked me at what stage did I think I would be unable to cope.

    "Incontinence" and "Double Incontinence" was my reply.

    Yet, when the time came that she had similar problems to your friend, I simply went in with her and helped.

    This stage didn't go on long as she soon went into care, but when it is not possible to explain, hint, etc there is only one option - helping.

    If it is any help, Jan was by then too far into the illness to be embarrassed, or to even show she thought it was abnormal. I absolutely hated it, but would have done anything for her.
     
  5. clayshant

    clayshant Registered User

    Jun 19, 2005
    3
    (sigh)
    Thanks for your swift reply guys, sometimes it seems you just have to do what you have to do..
     
  6. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    9,519
    Frinton-on-Sea
    Hi, I carry baby 'wet wipes' with me for use when Lionel & I are out. In fact I use them all the time now in Lionels bathroom at home. I figure that if they are strong enough to clean up after a baby, they can do the job, so to speak, for a grown up ( and they seem to be bigger)

    I know this does not help when they forget, but you do get to the stage of having to be with them, just to remind them of what used to be automatic. Regards, Connie
     
  7. Norman

    Norman Registered User

    Oct 9, 2003
    4,348
    Birmingham Hades
    Connie
    I note your use of baby wipes.
    I have just discovered Pampers wipes,they even give a dispenser for them.
    I have one problem?
    How can you prevent the patient putting them down the toilet?
    I have visions of the whole road up in arms with the toilets blocked
    Love
    Norman
     
  8. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    9,519
    Frinton-on-Sea
    Hi, yes Norman this can be a problem. I still encourage Lionel with the use of normal toilet paper, and keep the "wet wipes" (yes pampers are great) at hand by the bathroom sink. Lots of reminders help, and as I say I have to help Lionel a lot in this area, so I am on hand most of the time. Take care, love Connie
     

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