I said goodbye to my mam for the last time today, we had a lovely service which was sad and funny at the same time, it was nice to remember the funny times and heartbreaking to think of her inside that box. I sat and looked at the coffin and somehow it was like it was almost not real, but the tears falling from my eyes were real enough. I take the only comfort i can and that is now she is at peace and not demented and tortured by the evil disease.I think in the end she wanted to go and in her last week she actually said that in one of the only small sentences that could still come out. I have learned that i am strong through this and can deal with many things. I have cared for her, in life and death and i know in my heart that i was there for her and that helps me too. We had a hilarious meeting the the vicar who really made it all feel better and i think i started today not feeling quite as bad as i could have. I played her favourite songs and i hope she can hear them where ever she may be. Rip mam you will be loved forever!