This is the first time I have posted so excuse the rambling. My aunt has had memory problems for a few years now but over the last six months or so her behaviour and memory have got much worse. She goes to collect her pension several times a day. has been wandering and forgetting her way home. I arranged meals on wheels for her as she was forgetting to prepare proper meals - which she promptly cancelled, but then her social worker and I agreed that her memory was so bad that she could still have her meals and she'd cancel and forget about it on a daily basis and still get her meals!! (Does that make sense). She is also profoundly deaf - but has decided that through divine intervention, she's had a miracle cure and can hear perfectly well. She also drinks heavily, when she's drunk the wandering confusion and aggression are worse. Everything I have tried to do to to make things easier for her she doesn't want. and every time a CPN/doctor/social worker calls she seems to pull something out of a hat and isn't too bad - they just have'nt called when she's drunk yet. She has no children of her own and the rest of the family cousins and nieces are quick to criticise and have plenty to say but don't do anything to help - I'm not making it up - they run a mile. She lives over 20 Miles away from me so with working full time and a family I try to visit once or twice a week.
I am in trouble in work for taking time off and taking personal phone calls - my office manager has already given me a verbal warning. As aunt is not "immediate family" i.e. husband, children, they are not very sympathetic. This year they have insisted that I book out 75% of my leave in advance - so from now till the end of the year I have 5 days (!!) for any emergencies, and where auntie's concerned there are plenty. My husband is thoroughly fed up with the phone calls day and night from her friends and neighbours. I feel that whatever I try to do, it all goes wrong at the moment, I seem to have somebody permanently going on at me whether its aunt/work/family/social worker.
To cap it all, and this is what has really really upset me my aunt has now accused me of taking property, which she has misplaced/hidden from her house - it came out of the blue and I was stunned - she swore that this item was there when I called and I "took it". I don't know if it has turned up yet as I haven't called with her this week yet. It has upset me so much as when she loses her handbag/purse/ pension card etc, I have ALWAYS asked her if I can look in her cupboards and drawers and NEVER ever done this alone, always with her. Her next door neighbour was frosty towards me at the weekend so I assume that though her memory is appalling this has somehow stuck in her mind, and she's telling everybody. I feel tired and defeated and quite alone. I haven't told my husband, though I should, but I know his reaction would be to tell me not to visit her. Sorry about the rambling, but has anyone else had to deal with this sort of accusation?
I am in trouble in work for taking time off and taking personal phone calls - my office manager has already given me a verbal warning. As aunt is not "immediate family" i.e. husband, children, they are not very sympathetic. This year they have insisted that I book out 75% of my leave in advance - so from now till the end of the year I have 5 days (!!) for any emergencies, and where auntie's concerned there are plenty. My husband is thoroughly fed up with the phone calls day and night from her friends and neighbours. I feel that whatever I try to do, it all goes wrong at the moment, I seem to have somebody permanently going on at me whether its aunt/work/family/social worker.
To cap it all, and this is what has really really upset me my aunt has now accused me of taking property, which she has misplaced/hidden from her house - it came out of the blue and I was stunned - she swore that this item was there when I called and I "took it". I don't know if it has turned up yet as I haven't called with her this week yet. It has upset me so much as when she loses her handbag/purse/ pension card etc, I have ALWAYS asked her if I can look in her cupboards and drawers and NEVER ever done this alone, always with her. Her next door neighbour was frosty towards me at the weekend so I assume that though her memory is appalling this has somehow stuck in her mind, and she's telling everybody. I feel tired and defeated and quite alone. I haven't told my husband, though I should, but I know his reaction would be to tell me not to visit her. Sorry about the rambling, but has anyone else had to deal with this sort of accusation?