Feeling awful about how I reacted today and, to be honest, ashamed. Things have been going so very smoothly lately and even ‘normal’ and could almost forget about her ALZ. Today I went to visit my youngest daughter, a mother of 5 doing a nursing degree who needed support and a sounding board so, as it is something she rarely wants was I was more than willing. OH was happy with that and said why don’t you have a game of golf, meaning the practice field near to my daughter and so off I went and agreeing to be back for lunch which I was. As I opened the door back home I was met by so much anger demanding where I had been and did I know that there was a dirty mark on the hall mat left by my shoes!
Next thing was a tirade of how she has to do everything, which is totally untrue and unfounded, but she was livid. My first words conciltory and automatically non confrontational but with no affect and so I lost it and just yelled and shouted back which became a slanging match followed by silent treatment which nothing can breach or so it seems.
That’s it really, we have sat in silence all afternoon with her, as she does every day, watching the old reapeat TV programmes all of which are recorded overnight and during the day.
I lost all understanding and compassion and at the time just ignored the obvious fact that she had forgotten where I had gone and that she can’t help being obsessive about cleanliness. I know she will forget. Most of this but I most certainly won€t that’s for sure.
Thanks for letting me rant.[/