Thoughts please

Hazara8

Registered User
Apr 6, 2015
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Mum passed away peacefully on Saturday evening.
Covid has placed considerable pressure on hospitals and Care Homes. To emerge from that is indeed fortunate. The very taxing fluctuating levels of health and prediction which accompany the dementia condition are varied and still so unpredictable. One can only ever wish for 'peacefulness ' for a loved one at end of life. But in the period afterwards when one reruns the substantial level of Care, the ups and downs in respect of health and events which challenged one's capability both mental and physical in a way which perhaps never presented before, you seek peace of mind with regard to " did l do right?" or " did it need to be that way?". All of this seems normal if not distressing at times.
Every single case of dementia in a loved one is different. Sometimes bewildering in its presentation and in its eventual decline. I can state quite openly that l have witnessed such anomalies in the Care Home. I have seen Residents walking and talking, partaking of meals and behaving just as they have been doing for years - suddenly taken. Other residents living with numerous serious conditions and with regular relapses, nevertheless perking up the following morning as if nothing was amiss at all. So decline can sometimes be sudden and surprise even the well informed. When the dementia journey comes to an end then much of the previous anxiety and uncertainty ends also. Then, it is ourselves to which we turn and that introspection can be equally taxing as we " re- live" the whole story. Yes, the overpowering sense of loss prevails, but the daily challenging caring role has ended. And as has been stated before, the joyous moments, the goodly times in one's upbringing, the loving care and the flowering of life, all of this remains untouched and removed from the other. That is manifested in the loved one also, even when life comes to an end. And like the sun rising in the morning, needs no explanation, no words, because it simply is.

With warm wishes