After 5 years of being mainly housebound with OH because of his Dementia, I am now able (because he moved into a Care Home 8 weeks ago) to resume some of my old activities, attend meetings and events. Yesterday, I helped to organise and participated in an event where I met most of my fellow campaigners/activists and must say I got the warmest of welcomes from them all, though blank looks from the more recent recruits. However, - Why did everyone I spoke to have to assure me that I must not feel 'Guilty' about putting OH into a home? Every single one felt the need to say that I had 'done the time' and should now reclaim my freedom, etc. etc. Now this does not chime with my feelings at all. I do NOT feel in the least bit guilty. OH is in a home because he requires 24/7 care and safeguarding, which had become impossible for one wee, sleep deprived, wummin (me) to provide. I have not failed him, I have fought hard to secure the best possible place for him, pop in regularly and have quality time with him, take him wee treats, join in with activities, go for wee walks and attend to problems such as missing hearing aids, repeat prescriptions, finances, etc.etc. Why then does everyone assume that my caring life is behind me and that I need reassurance that I have 'done the right thing'?? It has left me wondering if I am somehow abnormal and uncaring, or is it just the old fashioned belief that putting your loved one into permanent care is the ultimate sin?