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The long lonely walk of the carer

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by Quilty, Jan 12, 2016.

  1. Quilty

    Quilty Registered User

    Aug 28, 2014
    1,056
    GLASGOW
    I have looked back on my posts to remind myself that life now is actually a great deal better than it was this time last year. I found this and thought new members might like it. I got all poetic late one night. Thank you friends for walking with me. Crying again now, but the good kind.

    In the dark moments I imagine being a carer like a long walk in the darkness. I can see figures beside me, in front of me and behind me. I dont know these people but just knowing that I am not alone gives me the strength to continue.

    This journey will end some day but I wont be the same person I was when we started. I will be older, worn and wise in a way I never wanted to be. But I know that holding the hand of the person I love and walking was all I could do. For me, not walking with them was NEVER an option. So I keep walking fueled by love and the memories of the past. Im glad I can only see a little way ahead. I only focus on the next few steps. Eventually we will get to the light and we will say goodbye.
     
  2. PollyP.

    PollyP. Registered User

    Oct 8, 2009
    327
    Herefordshire UK
    Thank you Quilty,

    That is lovely and really sums up how we carers live and survive. Thank goodness for Talking Point.

    Pauline
    xx
     
  3. fizzie

    fizzie Registered User

    Jul 20, 2011
    2,739
    I love this xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx It just sums it all up.
    Thank you everyone on TP for being here xxx
    love to you Quilty xx
     
  4. sleepless

    sleepless Registered User

    Feb 19, 2010
    3,232
    Female
    The Sweet North
    This is very moving, Quilty, and the last line especially so.
    Thank you for sharing it with us.
     
  5. copsham

    copsham Registered User

    Oct 11, 2012
    592
    Oxfordshire
    Quilty - tears in my eyes, so beautifully described.
     
  6. nannylondon

    nannylondon Registered User

    Apr 7, 2014
    2,476
    London
    Quilty what a fantastic post and so true read it with tears in my eyes xxxx
     
  7. CollegeGirl

    CollegeGirl Registered User

    Jan 19, 2011
    9,534
    North East England
    "Not walking with them was NEVER an option". Sums up my dad's decotion to my mam beautifully. Tears in my eyes after reading your post, Quilty. Love to you x
     
  8. nae sporran

    nae sporran Volunteer Host

    Oct 29, 2014
    5,928
    Male
    Bristol
    Beautifully written Quilty.
     
  9. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,597
    Kent
    What a meaningful post Quilty, so beautifully expressed. Take comfort from those of us walking with you.
     
  10. 6FNAUTICLUB

    6FNAUTICLUB Registered User

    Dec 26, 2015
    51
    I was just in process of putting on new thread and read this, such lovely words, we are very new to this but since Christmas things seem to have deteriorated with Mum and at the moment I feel overwhelmed with it all, seeing someone you love struggle day to day, not knowing what each day is going to bring is very hard and I don't seem to be able to focus on anything else, I know our troubles are not as bad as many others but it's the fear of the Unknown and being so helpless and not in control that seems to trouble me more xx
     
  11. Quilty

    Quilty Registered User

    Aug 28, 2014
    1,056
    GLASGOW
    My best advice is to try not to imagine the future. Just look a day or so ahead if you can. We cant predict the future but we can sure worry about it. Its better to save the energy. Love to you and strength
     
  12. DancerKaz

    DancerKaz Registered User

    Jan 10, 2016
    13
    Oxfordshire
    Very moving and beautifully written Quilty. I have recently found TP and what an amazing bunch of people you are on here. It has given me so much strength just knowing I am not alone.

    Thank you to each of you xx
     
  13. Deputypink

    Deputypink Registered User

    Aug 4, 2013
    44
    A tear has just dropped onto the iPad screen - I am going to print it out and share with the family . Thank you so much - inspirational x
     
  14. chick1962

    chick1962 Registered User

    Apr 3, 2014
    11,280
    Female
    near Folkestone
    Truly moving Quilty yet so beautiful xxxx


    Sent from my iPhone using Talking Point
     
  15. lizzybean

    lizzybean Registered User

    Feb 3, 2014
    1,398
    Lancashire
    Very meaningful & poignant.
     
  16. Sue J

    Sue J Registered User

    Dec 9, 2009
    8,041
    Quilty your post is beautiful.

    I echo the thanks to all on TP it's like climbing the same mountain and when someone helps you by understanding or giving the right advice you know its because they have trodden that same bit of the path before you. I too have learnt to take one day at a time and as you say often less than that just one step at a time.

    Love to youxx:)
     
  17. Adcat

    Adcat Registered User

    Jun 15, 2014
    290
    London
    Thanks so much. I'm walking with my dad. This somehow has just made me feel stronger than I've been feeling lately x
     
  18. Quilty

    Quilty Registered User

    Aug 28, 2014
    1,056
    GLASGOW
    We are with you adcat. Take strength from that. Love Quilty
     

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