My mom died last April after being in a care home only a few weeks. Her death certificate said ‘senile dementia’ though she actually had never had a formal diagnosis. Her deterioration had been so rapid. Up until September 2019 she was an active 93 year old who I saw often and took her away. Over the next couple of months she became forgetful and had two falls. She also became unable to read her magazines. After the second fall in December she remained in hospital and I visited her every day. She became doubly incontinent and unable to even get out bed. It was heartbreaking, because of Covid she was moved the day after lockdown started in March 2020 into a care home to be assessed. I was not allowed to visit her, they lost her hearing aid so I couldn’t telephone as she couldn’t hear. They seem seemed nice in the home. They put up balloons and decorations for her 94th birthday on April 2nd last year and they did a what’s app video that they sent me but she was clearly disorientated and didn’t understand it was her birthday even when they brought in a cake with candles for her. She stopped eating and drinking 10 days later and went into a coma and died 16th April. I begged them to let me in as I was sure I could have got her to eat and drink but I was not allowed to be with her, even at the end. I am struggling to come to terms with all this. I feel guilty she would have felt I had abandoned her and would not have understood Covid. And I am so sad to see ‘senile dementia’ as her reason for dying. Can anyone on here understand this feeling I have? How do I come to terms with losing her? Her funeral because of Covid was sad with so few of us allowed to be there. I try to reason with myself. She was 94, she had to die at some point but frankly I am not convincing myself, sorry this thread is so long but it is helping to write it down.