I have spent hours reading stories on the forums and have gained a wealth of knowledge about myself, the disease, and processing my feelings. I've come to the realization why I feel this guilt... That there is nothing more I could sanely do for her without jeopardizing my own frail mind, and that we loved each other so much. 2 days isn't going to take away watching 8 years of deterioration. I thank God I found this site, will share it with my family and I thank God for all of your stories, sharing your pain, your hope and stories of healing. I have copied many "quotes" that some of you have shared into my iPhone notebook and will reflect on them when I feel down. I will talk to trusted people about my feelings and dissect them so they don't eat me alive. I will dig out photos and momentous to have near me pre-diagnosis. I learned I am human. I am not a bad person. It is ok to feel anger, guilt, sadness, etcetera. I learned this is a long road, and reading about survivors like you all, brave warriors amidst this battle to care for a wide range emotions and tasks and of and the brave sick who keep going knowing how it ends gives me hope. You are all wonderful beautiful people. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I'll keep reading. NEWCOMERS: Welcome and keep reading. There is a treasure chest of hope and help here.