Sugar in her coffee

[Leopard]

Wow, just been reading your thread and on Tuesday you said your mum says there's children running about, so does mine and then asks why cant I come inside care home but it's ok for them kids to run about every day.
I also make a mental list of what I'm going to talk about when I get there, it's hard work just having a quick visit but nice when all goes well, which isnt all the time.
Just wanted to share with you about the children.

 

[Bikerbeth]

Wow, just been reading your thread and on Tuesday you said your mum says there's children running about, so does mine and then asks why cant I come inside care home but it's ok for them kids to run about every day.
I also make a mental list of what I'm going to talk about when I get there, it's hard work just having a quick visit but nice when all goes well, which isnt all the time.
Just wanted to share with you about the children.

It is strange as it is a consistent complaint. I know I have read other threads where the PWD sees and/or hears children running around. Thanks for sharing

 

[Bikerbeth]

Yes it is nice and easier to go along with the good memories @annielou.
did your Mum really going dancing at Ally Pally in her day @Woo2? Mum is always asking me if I went to the dance at the weekend

 

[Woo2]

Think both Mum & Nan did back in thier younger days

 

[Bikerbeth]

Mum got the receptionist to ring me today. Mum asked when I would be visiting. I said tomorrow at the normal time and place. She said good because the car is getting urgent. I said that ok we can sort it all out tomorrow.
Hopefully we will not have to talk about car issues tomorrow as that might get tricky when she has not been allowed to drive for 2 years and the car was sold then.
Poor Mum she loved driving so much.

 

[annielou]

I hope she’ll have forgot about car when she see’s you. Though sometimes can get stuck on a thought for a while often what they worry about one day has been forgotten by the next hasn’t it?Its odd the thoughts that pop up though isn’t it I find myself trying to figure out why thought of it but very often can’t.
Hope you have a good visit today ?x

 

[Agzy]

I remember when my dad was alive and had Parkinson’s with dementia I called in and he was sitting at the top of the stairs laughing and so happy. When I asked him about it he replied, “ i have just been watching my video.” When questioned further he said he had been watch all us little ones playing in the hallway as it was raining and it was on the video in his head. That is how he saw his hallucinations and moe often than not happy ones thankfully.

 

[Bikerbeth]

I remember when my dad was alive and had Parkinson’s with dementia I called in and he was sitting at the top of the stairs laughing and so happy. When I asked him about it he replied, “ i have just been watching my video.” When questioned further he said he had been watch all us little ones playing in the hallway as it was raining and it was on the video in his head. That is how he saw his hallucinations and moe often than not happy ones thankfully.

Based on most of the hallucinations being happy I do like that description of ‘video in his head’ I still love Mum’s description of my motorbike as ‘a car without a roof and only 2 wheels‘

 

[Bikerbeth]

I hope she’ll have forgot about car when she see’s you. Though sometimes can get stuck on a thought for a while often what they worry about one day has been forgotten by the next hasn’t it?Its odd the thoughts that pop up though isn’t it I find myself trying to figure out why thought of it but very often can’t.
Hope you have a good visit today ?x

Fortunately the car and it’s issue had gone on today’s visit. She did mix me up between being her daughter and being her sister. She asked me if I had been out dancing at the weekend and I said No I’m too old and stood up and did a silly dance saying with these dodgy knees and hips you must be joking. For once the smile went to her eyes again. The lady who Mum does not like wandered into her room and fortunately because Mum was in a good mood she politely told her and guided her out of the room and then shut the door on her. Yes she did talk a lot of nonsense but as generally content for once.

 

[annielou]

Sounds like a good-ish visit. Shame about the mixing you up, but glad her mood was good. Also glad car issue gone today and she was in a nice mood and polite to the interloper lady. The dance sounds like fun no wonder your mum smiled, that's something I'd do lol. I wish it was still the days when you could go out to dances at the weekend in your best frock, mind you I doubt I'd be able to do any of the dances, but I bet it was fun.

 

[Woo2]

I agree on the whole sounds an ok visit , I can just imagine your mum chuckling at your funny dance . Glad the car was forgotten for now and that the unwanted lady was dealt with calmly and politely . I like the description of bike ? Very true .

 

[Bikerbeth]

I think I was thinking about going to dances on a Saturday night when @Woo2 mentioned her Mum going to Ally Pally For dances. I guess I had the 70’s disco Saturday night fever etc ☺? was my teenage years
And talking about bikes - watch out for my new profile picture if I can work out how to change it - new motorbike coming next week - hurrah ?

 

[annielou]

Ooh exciting ?? brum brum, bet its not a scooter like those emojis

 

[Banjomansmate]

I found it difficult to hold a conversation with The Banjoman when he was in his Care home so goodness knows how difficult it is under current Covid circumstances.
When I first started helping with the Bat rescue? he found it interesting and amusing but within six months it was difficult to keep his mind on anything and he certainly had no interest in anything I had been doing.

 

[Bikerbeth]

I found it difficult to hold a conversation with The Banjoman when he was in his Care home so goodness knows how difficult it is under current Covid circumstances.
When I first started helping with the Bat rescue? he found it interesting and amusing but within six months it was difficult to keep his mind on anything and he certainly had no interest in anything I had been doing.

Really lucky where we live as we often have bats flying around which I think is a privilege to see (along with the owl).

 

[Woo2]

Look forward to seeing pic of your new bike @Bikerbeth ? ? ? Ha ha @annielou I would only be safe driving a? take a month of Sunday’s to get anywhere though !

 

[Bikerbeth]

So this mornings visit under the ‘new conditions’ was not too bad. The ‘minder’ sat outside in the corridor as she could see how agitated Mum was getting when she was in the room. Mum did not say anything about the move back to the 2nd floor (dementia) and her original room. However she did have a very swollen finger. It was double the normal size and blue/black. I find it very annoying that Mum can be given antibiotics to treat the swelling but cannot be given painkillers without her consent and she was refusing them. I really believe she does not have the capacity to do that anymore and did not realise what they were asking.
I believe she was in pain so the visit unsurprisingly was not brilliant. It was also shorter because of minder.
I rang up to find out what had happened to her finger but it seems that staff just noticed it was a little swollen on Sunday evening and then sent photos to GP on Monday who prescribed antibiotics as the swelling had increased.
I then received a phone call at 5.30pm to say GP had said to take Mum to A&E as swelling was now up her hand as well.
Another phone call at 6.20pm to say could I come down to A&E as she had refused to go into the hospital and tried to run away along the main road (prevented by a paramedic)
By the time I arrived the Carers had managed to get her inside and she was in a room but refusing treatment.
Basically the Dr wanted to sedate Mum so that they could lance the infection.
I sent Carers away as she was more agitated with them there and after an hour I finally managed to get her to take the tablets. I told the consultants that she had taken them and he came in to see Mum again and suddenly Mum said you can look at my finger. So he decided to do it there and then. My Mum was so brave and only let out a little ‘ouch’ yet it must have been so painful. I kept telling her she was doing brilliantly and if it was me I would have been crying as I am such a wimp. He got the finger dressed and at that point Mum suddenly yawned and was out for the count as the tablets had kicked in.
Consultant said she could then be discharged. Rang Care Home to say she would be returning in the next hour (fortunately being new they have an empty wing which they are using as a quarantine area) No bed made up though as they had expected hospital to keep her in. Called OH to come and pick us up. Good job as I could not have got Mum into my car even with the nurse helping as Mum was just dead weight. Got Mum back to Care home but me and OH had to get Mum into a wheel chair and hand her over in the doorway.
It was lovely to give Mum a hug and hold her hand again but obviously not in the circumstances.
she needs to go back to out patients on Thursday. I should be taking her so hopefully we can have a hug again although it will be far from ideal circumstances again. I am also guessing that I will be the ‘baddy’ taking her back to the nasty care home afterwards. A risk I will take.
saddest moment was when she said ‘ your Dad came in here and he didn’t come out’. Yet she has been in hospital 3 times since Dad died (a different hospital) without any hesitations previously
I just wish I could understand Mum better but she just can’t get out the right words most of the time. You can see her frustration too

 

[annielou]

Oh what a day, your poor mum and you. Well done on calming your mum enough for her to be seen by DR, I hope the infection heals soon. Is it same infection she had in her toe from not having nails cut do you think? I hope when she goes back on thursday it's clearing and healing ok. The no painkillers if mum said no is worrying isn't it. As you say your mum probably didn't realise what they were asking her about or realise that saying no would man she stayed in pain, what an awful situation. Hope mum goes on ok in quarantine x ? ?

 

[Woo2]

Oh @Bikerbeth , I’m so glad you managed to get mum calmed and to take tablets and get treatment ? I too wondered if it had any connection to toe . Nice you got a hug shame about that circumstances ,Hope Thursday goes ok?. It is very difficult about painkillers , does she have a favourite carer that could try or the receptionist maybe ? Take it Mum has to quarantine now ? That’s hard after just moving rooms again , a lot of change for her , hope she deals with it ok . Take care

 

[Sarasa]

What a day @Bikerbeth. I hope she settled in her new bed and someone manages to get her to take the painkillers. Well done with the visit to A&E, and managing to keep your cool. I totally lost it with mum after six hours in there with her in February, something I'm not proud of.
Good luck for Thursday.