I think brother was the last person out of 3 that I spoke to yesterday that knew what was best to do for Mum and the post was a vent. This included her elderly friend who told me I should get her sectioned immediately as she can’t lock her doors properly and is not safe because she put the teabag into the kettle ( now tell me something I don’t know) I might not be perfect but I am doing more than any of them and doing my best.
@Sirena - I think he is clutching at straws too. Yes you are right the assumption from him is that I would use the CCTV to keep an eye on her. He actually offered to have Mum for Christmas to ‘give me a break’ however Mum has in previous years said she would rather stay on her own than go there. Brother is very insular with his own immediate family and Mum often felt an outsider there.
As far as I am concerned Mum is not safe on her own and is lonely so options are either a Care Home or full time care at home. I genuinely think Care Home is the right way to go and that is what I am gently pushing for
@Sarasa i told my OH today that if brother is anyway responsible for Mum changing her mind then I will hand her care over to him and make him the main point of contact. It will be hard and I really would not like to do it so hopefully I am worrying unnecessarily
.@Palerider you are absolutely correct - some technical logo works but it depends on the person and the circumstances
On the positive, Mum has agreed to the Care Home Manager to visit her on Wednesday (basically to assess Mum) although of course they did not phrase it that way. Initial thoughts have been that Mum could have a room in the dementia section to receive extra support in the evenings/night when she gets confused but as she can still have some very good conversations she would be ‘free’ to mingle with residents in the other areas. Seems like a good idea but hopefully learn more in the next week. The month’s trial would then start the following Wednesday before she changes her mind.