Sudden blocking my entry to his room.

Discussion in 'Middle - later stages of dementia' started by CLEMENTINA, Nov 21, 2019.

  1. CLEMENTINA

    CLEMENTINA Registered User

    Jun 14, 2014
    15
    Its 02.16. My other half, 87, has for the first time stood inside his bedroom holding the handle to stop me getting in. He Is waiting to hear me as I come nearer, and saying no. It may be he has wet his nappy pants, as he hates my dealing with it and prefers carers to deal with it. I'm used to that and just glad he let's someone do it. He was diagnosed 7 years ago and gone downhill relatively slowly. This feels like a sudden downhill. However he has, unusually, a minor chest infection and had first dose of amoxicillin this evening. Just hoping the infection is partly to blame and will clear up and prove to be a factor. Just feel like telling the forum this. I have settled down in the next room. We usually share a room. Goodnight everybody.
     
  2. Kuiper27

    Kuiper27 Registered User

    Nov 17, 2019
    22
    Hi @CLEMENTINA

    Just to say hi, I'm sorry to read about your OH it must be heartbreaking for you both. I wish I had a magic wand, or a really good solution. The only thing I can say to you is you're not alone on here. There's always someone around. I'm going to read your thread now

    I hope he settles and gets well soon

    With love from
    Kuiper27
     
  3. CLEMENTINA

    CLEMENTINA Registered User

    Jun 14, 2014
    15
     
  4. CLEMENTINA

    CLEMENTINA Registered User

    Jun 14, 2014
    15
    Thanks Kuiper, It feels like being surrounded by friends at a really lonely time. I have not used the forum for years, it felt too overwhelming at first, but now I remember how it helped to "hear" other's voices. I'm joining a weekly carers' group in january and am sure that will help. Going to sleep easier now.
     
  5. Kuiper27

    Kuiper27 Registered User

    Nov 17, 2019
    22
    Oh that's good @CLEMENTINA

    I do voluntary work 3hrs a week. It's nice to do something different but more often than not I have to miss it because of dads and moms hospital appointments

    Anyway I'm going to try to sleep too

    Sleep well
    Kuiper27
     
  6. CLEMENTINA

    CLEMENTINA Registered User

    Jun 14, 2014
    15
     
  7. CLEMENTINA

    CLEMENTINA Registered User

    Jun 14, 2014
    15
    I hope, for you, that mom and dad will accept some regular outside help so that you can have routine ME downtime. I think back to some very hard times when I knew he was not safe to be out and about but he insisted on setting off and I had to drop everything and go on yet another unscheduled hike. Thank goodness carers now come in, and he accepts them. It's hard for you as I expect they believe they are capable at present of looking after themselves and reject what they see as intrusion, and attempts to remove their control. That stage is mainly over for me. Sadly it means losing most of the person (s) you knew, but ironically makes life easier. Keep going, you are dealing heroically with so many difficult situations! Clementina
     
  8. Kuiper27

    Kuiper27 Registered User

    Nov 17, 2019
    22
    Big hugs @CLEMENTINA

    I do understand what you are saying. I read your early morning post with some sadness. This is what the future may hold for mine. I think mom would accept help but he's adamant they don't need it. I didn't go this afternoon. I was too exhausted. I called mom she seemed OK. I'm taking them shopping tomorrow. I've learn to shop smart when we are out and do online shopping for heavy stuff. Dad couldn't get his head around online shopping. He thought it would mean he wouldn't go out or shopping. It took some doing to convince him that we still had to get day to day items

    How is your OH today? I do hope you're as OK as can be

    Love Kuiper27
     
  9. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,894
    Kent
    I hope so too @CLEMENTINA. Infections seem to have devastating effects on dementia.

    There is also the possibility your OH may be so badly affected by the infection he does not really know who you are. My husband had periods when he was unable to recognise me which made me wonder if it was something similar for you.

    This was not a permanent situation. It was usually during the times he was sundowning or indeed did have an infection.

    I hope once the antibiotics start to take effect things will improve.
     

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