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Thanks Annie h, and everyone taking the time to read and post - it's strange how supported you can feel sitting in front of a computer screen. It's still early days and it's very difficult to know how much she is processing or understanding at the moment, and how much is down to the stroke, the dementia , her personality or just exhaustion. Probably a combination. Still on the rehab ward, so seems hopeful, but this NG tube situation has really got to me, I know it's just routine stuff and thousands of people have them inserted , and I know it's the only way they are going to get some nutrition into her but , knowing that she may not fully understand what's going on, I just hope they are gentle with her and explain exactly what they're doing and why. I keep thinking what she would do if she had to make this decision for herself, she would probably say yes , being very practical and sensible as she was, if it's necessary do whatever you have to do. I know there are lots of you out there coping with much more on your own but it would have been so good to have a sibling to share this responsibility with. Sorry, self pity is my only excuse to eat chocolate and drink wine.Hi, I don't often visit TP now but just to say I went through a very similar experience 16 months before mum died. The clot-busting drug can be amazingly successful if given in time (although not guaranteed and as you say some potential side effects which I think mum also had). What I wanted to say was that if she has recovered some muscle control and other functions get onto rehab as soon as you can and don't accept any rubbish from them about it being a waste of time. My mum was in hospital for four weeks - mainly because they didn't put any effort into rehab, including continence and walking etc, therefore making it impossible for her to go back to the home she'd been in. Once we'd got her a place in a nursing home it was really too late and a lot of ground was lost through the delay but in spite of continuing scepticism from community physio team we were able to get her up and mobile again through expensive private physio and massive efforts from everyone to get her up on her feet again. If I had my time again what I would have been doing at your stage is shouting from the rooftops about disability discrimination if they are denying her rehab on the basis that it's not worth it because the dementia prevents her from following the instructions. She just needs more time and patience from physios who know how to deal with someone with dementia. It still makes economic sense too given the choice between a requirement for two staff members and a hoist every time someone has to be moved anywhere, or retaining some mobility and just requiring one staff member to walk alongside.