struggling to say goodbye

millie1986

New member
Jan 21, 2020
2
Just been to visit my mum and I don’t think we have long left, we were told 6 days ago that she had around a week before passing, she’s no longer on medication and I’m so worried that she is in pain but can’t tell me, she is only 64 and looks so young it’s heartbreaking, I’m trying to support my dad as I’m all he has after loosing my sister 12 years ago, and I feel helpless!
Once she does pass are there any grievance help centres that you can recommend for us both in Cardiff so I can be as prepared as I can be, as we had no help or suggestions from the doctors after my sister died,
Thankyou
 

Woohoo

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
687
South East
Hello @Clareduggan12 welcome to tp. I am so sorry to hear about your mum and your sister , how desperately sad for you and your dad . I have not much idea about counselling but I have heard that cruse is really good, hopefully others will be along soon and can help direct you . Please look after yourself too. I hope you can both get some counselling to help you move on and find peace . Take care .
 

Pete1

Registered User
Jul 16, 2019
490
Hi @Clareduggan12, I so sorry to hear about your Mum. if you have been given that prognosis she should be on end of life care, which would include pain management (if required).

I totally understand that you feel helpless, it is a very traumatic time for you and your Dad. I would recommend that you speak with your GP who should be able to arrange bereavement counselling or any other support they feel necessary for you and Dad. As an alternative as @Woohoo mentioned you can contact Cruse directly (just look up the contact number on the website).

It is such a difficult time for you and the family - I hope you and Dad are able to support each other. Stay strong - all the best.
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
70,390
Kent
Hello @Clareduggan12

I`m sorry you are faced with having to watch and wait for your mother`s passing. It is so upsetting . I believe if your mother was in pain you would be able to tell by her facial expression. Ask her doctors if palliative care drugs are in place in case she does show signs of experiencing pain.

Please ask your doctor to refer you for grief counselling. They may not be forthcoming by volunteering suggestions but I`m sure most surgeries have access to this service.
 

millie1986

New member
Jan 21, 2020
2
Hi @Clareduggan12, I so sorry to hear about your Mum. if you have been given that prognosis she should be on end of life care, which would include pain management (if required).

I totally understand that you feel helpless, it is a very traumatic time for you and your Dad. I would recommend that you speak with your GP who should be able to arrange bereavement counselling or any other support they feel necessary for you and Dad. As an alternative as @Woohoo mentioned you can contact Cruse directly (just look up the contact number on the website).

It is such a difficult time for you and the family - I hope you and Dad are able to support each other. Stay strong - all the best.
Thank you x