1. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    On Monday I went to the theatre with friends to see a production by the local musical society. It was a comedy, and brilliantly acted and sung. It was a lovely evening.

    On Tuesday morning I had arranged to bury John's ashes beside his tree in the garden of remembrance. I arrived at the crematorium in plenty of time, and #1 stepson met me there. We waited and waited, nobody came!

    We walked round to have a look at John's tree, and the hole had not been dug to receive his ashes. Stepson went round the back to see if he could find anyone, while I sat and shivered, and cried.

    Eventually he found someone, the appointment had not been put in the diary, so we had to wait while the hole was dug. By this time we were both in a state. But I wanted it done before the snow arrived. It's done, and we planted bulbs and flowers round the tree. But I miss having the ashes in the house. Silly, because that's not my belief, but logic doesn't seem to be working.:(

    On Wednesday I was to have cavity wall insulation (free, as I'm old!) I was to be ready by 8.00, with pictures off the walls. They arrived at 1.30, then sat outside for ages in their van. Eventually I went out and asked them if they were going to do the job. They had a problem!!!!

    The previous job had taken more material than expected, and they hadn't enough to do my bungalow. They had phoned their boss, and were waiting for instructions. They had come down from Perth, set out at 5am!

    Eventually it was decided they'd do two walls, and come back on Saturday to finish the job.:mad:

    Yesterday I had my final session with my counsellor. I'd taken a copy of the poem she'd asked me to write, she was in tears as she read it, and asked if she could keep it! Anyway, I was offered more sessions, or referral to a psychologist, but I said I didn't need either. I know what my problems are, and thanks to her they are now on the surface, so I can handle them. So I'm discharged!:)

    Today I have a peaceful day, just some friends visiting this afternoon, may even get some housework done this morning. Then the wall people again tomorrow.

    Who said retirement was boring?:eek:
     
  2. sad nell

    sad nell Registered User

    Hazel so glad you managed to plant Johns tree , what a traumatic time it must have been for you and Johns son, I can understand you missing Johns ashes at home, nothing is logic when emotions take over,Am glad you feel strong enough to deal with your feelings in your own time. Hope you have a nice day and that the sun is shining on Johns tree and your home insulation goes to plan. Sending you my love Pam
     
  3. Libby

    Libby Registered User

    May 20, 2006
    625
    North East
    Hazel - I felt so sad to hear that they hadn't put you in the diary - such a small thing to do - yet so much pain caused for forgetting to do it.

    Hope yesterday was peaceful and you had a lovely day with friends.

    Libs x
     
  4. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Thanks, Pam and Libby.:)

    The cavity wall insulation is now complete.:):):)

    I really didn't think they'd come today, we had snow overnight, and they had a long drive to get here, but they came, two and a half hours later than they said, but I was so pleased to see them.

    That's it now for the winter, I'm not doing anything else to the house till spring. (Thank goodness, says my bank manager!)

    I'm just going to relax and enjoy it.:)

    Love,
     
  5. noelphobic

    noelphobic Registered User

    Feb 24, 2006
    3,452
    Liverpool
    Hi Hazel

    So sorry to hear about the mess up over the tree. I hope they were extremely apologetic at the very least!

    We haven't yet scattered my mum's ashes. I'm not looking forward to it but in another way I want it to be over, if that makes any sense.
     
  6. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Thanks Brenda.:)

    Not extremely apologetic -- of course, it was someone else's fault!

    I know exactly what you mean about the ashes. On the one hand, I wnted them buried before the frost. On the other hand, I liked having them here with me.

    You'll scatter your mum's ashes when you feel ready. In a way, it's closure. In another way, it's just renewing the loss.

    It's never easy.

    Love,
     
  7. sleepless

    sleepless Registered User

    Feb 19, 2010
    3,232
    Female
    The Sweet North
    Hazel, you can look forward to the bulbs coming up in the spring, what did you plant?
    And if my Dad's experience with cavity insulation is anything to go by, your house should be warmer than it would have been before.
     
  8. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    59,431
    Female
    Dundee
    A difficult time Hazel, it must have been hard for both of you. Glad you have the house sorted for now. Snow going here now. Hope it's not too bad with you. xx
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.